Without you
by ImNotCallingYouALiar
Summary: Breathing heavily my eyes flickered between them. One my best friend, the other the love of my life. How could i choose? I never asked for this life. When had life gotten so complicated? Damn wolf genes! A sequel to thicker than blood. Rated T for safety.
1. Losing you

_This is a sequel to Thicker than Blood, and it will be much easier to understand if you've read that first. You are probably all going to hate me after this chapter. But please give it a chance?_

Laughing I leant back letting my book fall to the ground as Embry peppered my face with kisses his hand never straying too far from my stomach. As always I leant into his abnormal heat my giggles filling the room. My love for him was unexplainable. I couldn't imagine a world without him.

"Stop it," I laughed feebly pushing him away.

"You know you love it," he winked placing a chaste kiss on my lips. As always my head spun. Ever since the day we had met he had the ability to make me dizzy. I never got tired of the sensation.

"Yuck! Get a room," Brady scrunched up his nose before turning back to the television. Across the room Emily rolled her eyes at me as she patted her own pregnant stomach and a retired Sam massaged her feet while anxiously glancing out of the window every so often.

"Just because your jealous," Embry smirked at the back of Brady's head as he continued to rub my belly. Embry tucked a strand of hair behind my hair as I felt a familiar jolt which I had come to love over the months.

"It always kicks when you speak," I muttered a tiny hint of jealousy seeping into my voice. Embry raised his eyebrows at me as his warm brown eyes drinking in the sight of my flushed face. Pregnancy was making me warmer these days and Embry was always overly conscious of his own heat. I narrowed my eyes as he edged away from me a little. I didn't care if I was as warm as the sun, there was no better place in the world than in Embry's arms.

"Aww she's a daddy's girl then," he grinned in attempt to rile me up. I only pursed my lips tilting my head to watch Claire's sleeping figure curled up on the armchair, her worn copy of Cinderella fallen in her lap.

"Stop saying it's a girl," I smiled, secretly hoping it was, "you don't know that for certain."

"I am certain she's a girl," his hand lingered on my cheek for a moment, "and besides we cant call her an it. That's just rude."

"Well Dee thinks it's a boy," I retorted as Colin swore under his breath and threw the remote on the ground before storming out of the room.

"Dee's intuition is just about as great as her smell," he wrinkled his nose as if recalling a memory, "and besides I'm the Dad. I get first pick."

"I hate to tell you but you don't get to pick wither it's a boy or a girl," Sam called from across the room while Emily whacked him across the head. High pitched screams came from up the stairs almost as if they could hear their Dad's voice. Emily narrowed her eyes as Sam stuck his tongue out at her. She had only just got them to sleep.

"Its your turn," she told him as the cries got louder. Embry hid a smirk behind his hand while Claire squirmed restlessly in her sleep.

"Hey!" I squeezed Embry's hand, "that will be you in a few months."

"Thank God we're not having twins," he groaned as if the thought scared him.

"Maybe I am and I just haven't told you?" I grinned as Sam reluctantly got to his feet and trudged slowly from the room. Embry looked momentarily scared for a second as his hand stilled on my belly before he narrowed his brown eyes at me. I smiled innocently.

"I went to the scan with you," he continued to rub my stomach, "and there's definitely not two little monsters in there."

"Hey!" I shouted out as it kicked again, "I don't think she likes being called a monster."

"You called it a she!" Embry exclaimed his eyes widening. The couch groaned under my weight as I shifted around.

"Well we have to call it something don't we?" I snapped feeling suddenly hungry. All throughout my pregnancy I had been having cravings for Emily's blueberry muffins and her strawberry cheesecake. Distantly I wondered if there was any in the kitchen.

"I hope she has your eyes," Embry said suddenly. Looking down I blushed a deep red as I noticed him staring at me intently. I never, ever got tired of him watching me daydream, every time was like a new experience.

"No way," I shook my head furiously, "I want her to have your eyes not my soulless grey ones."

"Their not grey," he argued, "their a unique silver."

"Silver," I scoffed, "brown eyes are much nicer."

Embry opened his mouth to argue again but Colin burst through the door before he could speak, shirtless and dripping of rain. My heart squeezed in my chest. Embry and I shared a long look, we both knew what was coming.

"Two of them. Too close to La Push," Colin panted before turning and running out into the rain again. Emily frowned anxiously at his departing figure while I clung desperately onto Embry's hand. I didn't want to ever let go. Brady dropped the remote and followed Colin. Stupid wolfs. Stupid vampires.

"Ava," Embry's voice was soft almost as if he was talking to a child.

"Please don't go." A bad feeling had wormed its way into my body. I grabbed onto his hand tighter as his eyes flickered outside, I could tell he was itching to get out there.

"As soon as she is born I promise to give up," he whispered leaning in for a kiss. My lips were frantic on his as I pulled him closer to me savouring his taste. I always hated letting him go.

"You promise?" I muttered, needing to hear him say it again. His brown eyes softened as he placed a much more gentler kiss on the palm of my hand before letting his lips rest on my belly for a second. I tried to keep my breathing even.

"I promise. We'll be fine, there's only two of them. A piece of cake," he spoke sincerely, "love you Ava. Love you too baby."

"We love you too," I croaked but my only answer was the slam of the door. The cries of the twins from upstairs ceased as I sniffed back useless tears and glanced at my book lying forgotten on the floor and the silence of the paused game on the television screen. It was almost too quiet.

"Are you alright?" Emily asked smiling. Her bright yellow nail polish seemed to glare at me from across the room. She was almost too happy. Pregnancy seed to make her more beautiful than normal where as I just looked like I had a pillow under my top and looked generally fat.

"I just have this bad feeling," I muttered. She nodded almost in understanding but I don't think she really did. The feeling was eating away at me inside, consuming me slowly as if preparing me for pain. Pushing it away I gingerly got to my feet. Sam smiled kindly at me as he re-entered the room his finger pressed to his lips.

"Do you still have blueberry muffins left?" I asked hesitantly chewing on my bottom lip. I hated imposing on the Uleys when Embry wasn't around, even if Emily and I had become close friends over the years. It still felt strange.

"Of course Ava," she smiled as she cuddled into Sam's side, "I made three baskets this morning. There should be a couple left."

Nodding I hobbled into the kitchen my heart thumping in my chest. Snatching a muffin from the basket I glanced out of the window, my bad feeling growing worse and worse by the second. Gripping tightly onto the edge of the kitchen counter I watched as my knuckles grew white.

"You alright in there?" Sam called from the lounge. I blinked as a blurry figure darted along the tree line. I licked my lips, growing more anxious.

"Of course," I lied flinching as the rain hammered repeatedly on the kitchen window shattering the eerie silence.

Letting the muffin fall to the floor I let out a gasp of pain as the feeling grew even more. A sharp pain shot through my body making me clutch my heart. Something wasn't right. I let out a scream as lightening flashed close to the house. Too close.

"Ava!" Sam came running into the kitchen his mouth turned downwards into a frown, "what's wrong?"

"I don't kno-" another shot of pain engulfed me cutting off my words. This time it didn't stop, clutching the counter even tighter I blinked as the kitchen began to spin around me. The lights flickered on and off. Something was wrong. A painful howl sounded from outside. Sam's flinch confirmed what I already knew. The howl got louder, almost deafening, until I couldn't hear anything else.

Fighting the urge to cover my ears I stumbled towards the door my hand laying protectively over my baby. Thunder rumbled from above me as I fell out into the rain.

"Ava. Stop," Sam's urgent voice came after me. Finding a strength I hadn't known I'd possessed I pushed him backwards as I continued to run towards the forest. The howl continued to get louder, it tore at my heart strings. I knew it was Embry. I just knew.

Mud splattered my white sundress as the branches tore at my exposed skin. Everything seemed to take on a different form in the dark.

"Embry!" I shrieked spinning around in a wild circle.

Another blurry figure darted to my right as I sobbed loudly. More howls echoed around me. A flash of grey caught my eyes, pressing my hand over my mouth to stop a hysterical scream I stumbled towards it.

"No," I whispered brokenly, "No. No. No. _No_!"

His grey fur was littered with rain which made him almost sparkle. The black spots littering his fur which had always made him unique seemed to glare at me. I watched and waited for the rise and fall of his stomach, for him to howl again. Anything. Instead I was granted with silence. Nothing. The only sign of my Embry was his soulful brown eyes wide open with fright.

Choking on the air around me I fell to my knees beside my world, the reason for my existence. No longer did pain consume me instead I felt numb.

"You cant leave me," I whimpered, "Don't you dare leave me Embry bloody Call. What about our daughter?"

My only answer was the hiss of the wind as it sent a shiver down my spine and the silence of the wolfs that had gathered around me.

How the hell was I supposed to live without him? Without Embry?

I screamed.

_Thoughts?_

_I am uploading the next chapter right now, so please read it and then let me know wither you think I should continue. Thanks __J _


	2. Forgetting you

_This is just over sixteen and a half years after chapter one._

_In case you get confused Seb, Samson and Sarah are Emily and Sam's children._

_Madison is Kim and Jared's._

_And finally Silver is Ava's child._

_Here we go..._

Blinking quickly I tied my hair up and watched the familiar blur of green pass as we raced by the trees. Chewing on my bottom lip I glanced at my mobile. Ten missed calls. I was in for hell when I got home.

Madison's coppery red hair fell around her face in long strands and I bit back a laugh as she cursed loudly before pressing down on the accelerator as she turned the corner. I slammed into the door beside me. It had been a long night.

"Seth is going to kill me," Sarah whined from the back seat her green eyes shining out in the darkness. Madison and I shared a long look.

"Maybe he wont find out?" Madison suggested glancing down at her painted nails as they tapped the steering wheel repeatedly. Rain fell hard down on the windscreen making me nervous.

"Of course he'll find out," Sarah breathed looking pale. I glanced once again out the window. She was right, of course he was going to find out. He always did. It was Seth after all, Sarah was his everything and they never let us forget it.

"Just deny it," Madison shrugged as if bored with conversation. She raised her eyebrows at me before turning to peer out of the windscreen her face scrunched up with concentration. Before I even turned to face Sarah I knew she would be scrunching up her nose in disgust, I don't think the word lie was even in Sarah's vocabulary. Madison out of all people should have understood her pain instead she just ignored it. Typical. I sighed. As always it was down to me to play the peacemaker.

"Look just tell him it was my fault," I murmured picking at a loose thread on my jeans. They were mud splattered and in serious need of a wash.

"Like he would ever believe that," Madison scoffed, "imagine little Silver trying to corrupt Sarah."

Sinking down in the passenger seat I closed my eyes my heart thumping loudly in the tiny car. I wished the boys were with us, they saved me from the drama.

"Look," Madison spoke in a monotone, "we all know its hard to keep a secret from your imprint. Well….I don't personally know but I've seen my mum and dad suck face long enough to know the ins and outs of imprinting. Just pout and stroke his arm, he wont even notice what your saying, he'll be too busy staring at your lips"

I didn't need to turn around to know Sarah was blushing a deep red. Hiding a smirk behind my hand I curled my legs up underneath me and shifted my position.

"Y-you know we're just best friends," Sarah stammered twisting a strand of hair around her finger anxiously, "he doesn't think of me like that."

"Not for long sweetheart," Madison winked at her in the mirror, "not for long."

Sarah wriggled around the backseat, obviously uncomfortable. Not thinking I whacked Madison on the arm. Hard.

"Bloody hell," she whined, "what was that for? Do you _want_ to walk?"

"Stop picking on Sarah," I grumbled, "and besides Uncle Jared said its much my car as it is yours."

"Sure, sure. Dad talks a lot of crap," Madison flipped me off before turning back to the road. She had always had the attention span of a goldfish and behind the wheel I feared she would send me to an early grave. I swallowed loudly.

"Look do you want me to get Seb to sneak you in?" I asked ignoring Madison's raised eyebrows. However much I denied her theories she still believed I was in love with Seb, the mere thought made me cringe.

"Nah," Sarah shook her head as she tried unsuccessfully to flatten her hair, "its not only Seth that's going to be waiting. Dad will be up to and if you go get Seb you'll have to wake Samson up too and you know what he's like."

I grimaced thinking back to the countless times I had been dragged from parties by him and his scarily calm expression when he was helping me with my homework. He was brilliant, the best big brother in the world but sometimes he overdid it.

"Yeah," I frowned, "over protective ass doesn't even begin to cover it. Besides Uncle Sam wont be too hard on you, you never normally sneak out."

"I hope so," she smiled sadly. Suddenly an overwhelming amount of guilt washed over me, I felt like I was corrupting Sarah which was definitely not what I wanted to do. She was happy, she had Seth and the rest of her life just stretching out in front of her, Madison and I shouldn't have been involving her with our problems.

"But," Madison was smirking as she turned to face me, "you have to admit. Samson is one piece of hot overprotective ass."

I groaned as I hid my face in my hands while Sarah scrunched up her nose again.

"Eeew," she squealed pressing her hands over her ears, "that's my brother your talking about!"

"Come on!" Madison hit the steering wheel, "even you have to admit he's sexy. Or in Silver's case Seb."

"Shut up," I growled turning to glare at her. I let out a sigh of relief as Madison turned up the familiar drive. Instantly my relief was shattered as I noticed all the lights on in the house. We were so dead. I winced as the gravel crunched underneath us. Sarah had gone deathly pale.

"You can guys can go," she whispered her knuckles white as she clutched her bag to her side. Shadows moved within the house and I frowned as Seth flung open the front door Aunt Emily close behind him.

"Okay that's gre-" Madison began eager to speed off.

"No. We got you into this mess. We'll fix it," I interrupted as Seth opened the car door and pulled Sarah out into his arms. Madison looked away while my heart squeezed in my chest.

"Where the hell have you been?" Seth's voice sounded strained and from my seat I watched as he squeezed his eyes shut almost as if remembering a painful memory. Sarah melted into his embrace and only the slight pink tinge covering her cheeks showed her pleasure. Jealousy consumed me.

A rap on my window caused to scream out. Turning I glared at Seb as he smiled lazily at me through the window his black hair falling effortlessly over his light green eyes. I envied his easygoing nature.

"Are you trying to kill me?" I grumbled stumbling from the car. Slinging his arm around my shoulder he laughed loudly pulling me closer to his side. He smelled like the sea.

"All guns are blazing," he whispered lowly his lips brushing my ear as we walked slowly towards the house. Out of the corner of my eyes I smirked as I watched Madison slam the car door behind her with fury.

"Crap," I murmured, "My mum?"

"Only phoned like ten times. Samson went out to look for you."

My stomach twisted as we neared the house trying to sort out my story in my head.

"We were in Forks," I admitted. Seb's lazy walk paused momentarily as he whistled lowly under his breath. I hid my face in his chest as we walked up the steps to the house, they creaked underneath us. Behind us Madison cursed under her breath as she reapplied her lip-gloss.

"Just feel lucky your Uncle Paul is on patrol tonight," Seth breathed, "and if I were you I would withhold where you were."

"I'm not stupid," I spat as the warmth of the house engulfed me. From the hallway I could see a tired Emily in the kitchen cooking furiously in her pyjamas.

"You could have fooled me," Seb remarked as we finally entered the lounge. I felt like I was on trial. Samson looked furious as he stood beside his Dad, easily towering over him, although his mouth was curved upwards into a smirk a sign that he was more amused than angry. Quietly I exhaled in relief.

Seth and Sarah sat on the sofa, she was wisely staring intently at the ground. I winced as Madison fell into the room behind us and I glared at Seb as he retracted his arm from around my shoulder and flopped down on the armchair. Traitor.

"Uncle Sam-" I began since no one else was going to.

"Do you know Ava has phoned twelve times," I winced as Sam scowled at me, "luckily your Aunt Dee came down for a visit."

"Dee's there!" I shrieked before I could stop myself. Seb rolled his eyes at me while Samson choked out a laugh. I had missed Dee so much that my heart physically ached, I always dreaded the day that she had to leave again. She always made my Mum forget, something I could rarely do. She made her smile.

"Look," Sam carried on as if I hadn't even spoken, "this isn't acceptable. I don't know what's gotten into you girls but not coming home until half two in the morning is just not acceptable. You know that."

"We were at a party," Madison glanced down at her nails to avoid looking at him. Her short dress and heels looked ridiculous in the Uley's house.

"I don't care where you were," Sam sighed, "but I should let you know your Dad is furious." Madison flinched. I felt sorry for her having to face the wrath of Jared he was almost as harsh as my Uncle Paul. Sarah looked about ready to burst into tears while Seb made a cutting motion across his neck, I fought the urge to flip him off.

"Look," I spoke quickly, "this is my fault."

"Yeah right," Seth and Samson spoke at the same time. I glowered at them both.

"It was!" I cried while Seb smiled gently at me. My head felt light and my tongue felt dry from all the alcohol I had consumed. I just needed to sleep. Why did no one believe me?

"This is ridiculous," Emily muttered walking into the room, "you all need to sleep and we can talk about this in the morning. Girls I told Ava and Kim you will stay here tonight. Besides," she smiled slightly, "hopefully Jared will have gained insight by the morning."

"Yeah an maybe pigs will fly," Madison sighed as she sunk to the floor. Seth pulled Sarah closer to his side as she blinked sleepily and Samson bent down to help Madison take off her heels. I stood alone in the centre of the room. As always.

"Right," Emily was all business like, "girls you can all sleep in Sarah's room. And yes Seth before you even ask, you can sleep on the couch. Now _goodnight_."

We all laughed nervously as she stalked from the room.

"Goodnight," Sam grumbled also heading for the door, "don't think your getting off lightly. Punishments will be discussed tomorrow."

Samson and Seb laughed under their breaths while us girls shared a terrified look.

"Just another night in the Uley house," Samson grinned.

"Nothing but drama," I agreed walking towards the door.

It had been a long night.

_Thoughts?_

_Should I continue?_

_Until next time x_


	3. Noticing you

_Thank you so much to all of you that reviewed, its nice to hear that people are enjoying my work and it makes me write faster. Also thank you to everyone who has story alerted it also makes me happy that people want to read more chapters._

_Here's a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's daughter. Madison is Kim and Jared's. Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children._

_Here's the next chapter. Hope it clears some stuff up. Enjoy…_

Clutching my cup of coffee in my hand I sunk deeper into the armchair as I yawned. Frowning I tried to push away the headache that was consuming me to no avail. Automatically my eyes flickered around the room until they rested on the familiar photograph sitting on the table. It had been there since I was born, glaring at me as if reminding me of what I had lost. What I would never have.

He was smiling, just as he had been in any photo I'd seen of him, I liked to think of him as permanently happy. It was a cheeky grin suggesting that he had been up to no good. His russet coloured skin seemed to shine in the sunlight and his eyes so much like mine seemed to be watching me. Unusually he stood in the middle of the group, my mum securely tucked into his side-she looked happy too- I don't think I had ever seen her smile so widely. The rest of the pack were cluttered around them. Uncle Paul had a hotdog in his hand. But my eyes kept going back to my Dad, his protective hand on my Mum's belly. It was the closest he had ever come to holding me.

"Do you miss him?"

Jumping up I let out a curse as coffee sloshed over onto my hand. Samson was by my side instantly his eyes soft as he took the mug from my hand. I sniffed quietly.

"You cant miss someone you never knew. Never met," I spoke stiffly wishing everyone else would hurry up and wake up. The air around us grew cold and I hugged my body tightly as if to protect myself from anymore questions. I didn't like questions, they made me feel exposed.

"That's not true," Samson's voice was adamant as he looked at the photograph, "I've never met Billy Black and Old Quil yet I feel like I know them."

"You cant," I shook my head adamantly, "not really. You never spoke to them. You may know the stories they told but you don't know what they smelled like or what they would say to you if you needed advice. It's not the same," I murmured turning the photo away from me. It hurt too much to look at. Samson's dark green eyes seemed to peer into my soul, it made me uncomfortable. He always seemed to know what I was thinking.

In a way I was sad that Samson and I had never become good friends despite all the time we spent together growing up, sure he was always there when I needed him but if I needed a shoulder to cry on it would always be Seb that I would run to. Seb was my rock. Seb didn't ask questions which made him so strikingly different from his twin. Seb was my best friend. It had always been that way.

"Do you want me to make pancakes?" Samson asked as he reached up to run his hand through his hair before realising it wasn't there. Unusually he looked lost, as if he didn't know what to say to me. Showing emotions was normally too much for Samson to handle. He was so much like Uncle Sam.

"Why did you cut it?" I blurted out. The question had been lingering on my mind for months. He used to have such soft silky hair that any girl would have longed to run their hands through, yet he cut it like it was no big deal.

He peered down at me emphasising how big he had gotten. He seemed more like a man than someone only a mere year older than me. The change shocked me.

"It's more convenient for when I turn wolf," he shrugged turning to go out of the door. I didn't get the twins excitement at becoming wolfs. My Dad had been killed performing his duty, did they really want to waste their lives chasing after vampires and risk losing their families, the peopled they loved? I worried about them. Seb especially, I didn't know if he would be able to cope with the sheer demand of being a wolf, he had always been a free spirit, he didn't cope with leadership well.

"Why are you so certain that your going to become a wolf?" I asked quietly too afraid to voice my other opinions, I knew Samson of all people would never understand what went on in my mind.

"Its in my genes-" he began.

"Its in my genes too. Doesn't mean I'm going to turn wolf," I hoped.

"But you're a girl and for you its much more unlikely," his mouth tilted up at the corners slightly, "but its not just my genes but…. have you looked at me lately? I'm even bigger than my Dad and I have muscles that I never had before. And feel-" he grabbed my hand placing it on his arm, "feel how warm that is, that's not natural body temperature."

My hand felt so small on Samson's arm as he looked down at me almost in urgency, as if he needed me to believe him. I hadn't noticed how warm he had gotten before. My eyes widened.

"Silver?" Seb stood in the doorway his light green eyes lingering on my hand which lay on Samson's arm, he looked unusually stiff. Swallowing loudly I took a step back forcing a smile on my face.

"Seb," Samson muttered gruffly before stalking out of the room. His mood had changed in an instant and I didn't understand what I had done to upset him. Seb frowned as his eyes followed his twin down the hallway before he turned to face me.

"Are you alright?" he asked gently his eyes glancing quickly around the room and landing on the photo I had turned around.

"I'm great," I lied smiling brightly as I took a step towards Seb. He hugged me tightly and I knew he didn't believe me but I loved him for not asking. As I hugged him I realised how unusually warm he also had become over the previous weeks. I didn't want to lose my best friend too. I don't think I could handle being alone.

Forcing back tears I kept my eyes on the ground as I took a reluctant step backwards. I could feel Seb's eyes on me. In a way he was always watching me but I had gotten used to it over the years.

"Fancy a bit of paint therapy?" the warmth in his voice seemed to seep into my blood and I found myself smiling despite my headache and Samson's frosty departure. He always knew what to say to make me feel better.

"Of course," I grinned following him out of the room. Samson was nowhere to be seen.

Ten minutes later I found myself wearing one of Seb's already paint splattered tops with my mud splattered jeans and bare feet. Seb grinned at me from across the garage which Sam and Emily had long ago converted into his art studio. I had spent most of my teenage years in that garage- watching Seb work, mixing paints or just simply talking. It had always been my happy place. My hiding place.

"You ready?" Seth called from across the room.

"As I'll ever be," I shouted. Picking up a random paintbrush I dipped it into the red paint before flinging it at the white wall, it was so satisfying as always to see the messy splash of colour that I had created. Seth picked green and also furiously splatted the wall. Dipping the brush in random paint pots I continued to launch the colours towards the wall.

Our parents had never understood 'paint therapy' as Seb called it. They didn't understand the freedom that it created or the sense of childhood that I often longed for. Most of all we did it together, it was our thing and it was alright that no one else understood it. Later, we would paint the wall white again ready for our next session. And unbelievably it worked, I always felt lighter, more at ease after flinging paint at a wall. Its ridiculous, I know.

"Hey!" I cried as Seb flicked his paint towards me instead of the wall. I groaned at the thought of washing it out of my hair later, it was torture.

"You are so in for it," I cried walking slowly towards him with my paintbrush in my outstretched hand. But Seb was quicker. Using his newly developed strength he pushed me against the wall with a smirk on his face. I was helpless. Laughing I tried to push him away to no avail.

Still smiling Seb deliberately swiped his paintbrush across my face covering me with green paint. Then picking another colour he leaned closer to me reaching for my hair.

"No. Please don't," I gasped between laughs.

All of a sudden I was aware of his abnormal body heat as he pressed against me and how close his face was to mine. His light green eyes widened as he also noticed our close proximity. He only had to move forward a fraction and then…

"Silver!"

Seb jumped backward as if electrocuted while I leant against the paint covered wall panting for breath. Uncle Paul stood in the doorway his eyes narrowed as he took in the paint covered garage and my flushed cheeks . I swallowed loudly as I met Seb's eyes.

"Your Mum and Aunt Dee are here," Paul almost growled, "punishment time."

I was in trouble and Paul almost seemed pleased about it. Although that was nothing unusual.

Following Paul slowly out of the garage I looked back to find Seb still watching me. Offering him a weak smile I tried to push away the thoughts of the incident that had almost occurred. We were best friends. Nothing more.

"Good luck," he mouthed before his eyes flickered once again to the paint splattered wall and he reached for a paint brush.

I was going to need it.

_Thoughts?_

_I know some of you are upset that I killed off Embry put please give the story a chance?_


	4. Punishing you

_Thank you all so much for your reviews, they are what keep me writing. Also thank you to everyone who has favourited my story. You all rock!_

_Quick reminder: Madison is Kim and Jared's daughter, Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children, and Silver is Ava's daughter._

_Enjoy…._

Walking sluggishly into the kitchen I felt strangely like I was on trial. My face still slightly flushed I glanced around before swallowing loudly. Madison blinked rapidly her coppery red hair in a messy bun and her make up which she had obviously forgotten to take off was smeared all over her face. Sarah sat on the counter looking very alone without Seth who was on patrol, her face was still pale and an opened book lay on her lap.

Trying to keep my face neutral I glanced around the rest of the room. Jared sat at the table his hands curled into fists as he focused his gaze on Madison while Paul smirked at me making me shuffle uncomfortably from foot to foot.

Finally I made myself look where I really didn't want to. My mum looked distracted as she gazed out of the Uley's kitchen window, there were bags around her grey eyes as if she had slept little and her hands clutched the mug in her hand as if to give her something to do. But most of all she looked disappointed which was a kick in the stomach. I wrapped my arms tightly around my body.

Aunt Dee looked the picture of perfection as always and her gold eyes seemed to be watching my every movement as if looking for something. Her presence seemed to make all of the wolfs stiff even Sam who had been retired for years. While Aunt Em did what she always did when she felt nervous or uncomfortable. She cooked, filling the kitchen with delicious smells in the process.

"Silver," Dee's voice was airy and musical sending a shiver up my spine, "what the hell are you wearing darling? Have you even worn any of those clothes I sent you from Paris? Alice would be appalled." She tapped her painted fingernails on the table, a human habit that she had apparently never grown out of while I pulled at the bottom of Seb's paint splattered top. It smelled like him.

"I-" I began to speak but Sam cut me off with a scowl on his face. Ducking my head again I hid behind my curls as my Mum finally looked at me her eyes furious.

My Mum and I had always been a unit, of course there were days when she drifted off but that was always to be expected. We were each half of one whole and I longed more than anything for the days where she was awake before me and we would clash with our sarcastic tendencies, but those days were little. Sometimes I just wanted to slap her, to see what my Mum was like all of those years before I was born, when she had Dad by her side. Some of the stories Dee told me I just couldn't bring myself to believe. I loved my Mum more than anything else in the world which was why I strived so hard to please her. But I was tired. Tired of pleasing her. Tired of pleasing other people. I just wanted to be me, but I was discovering not many people liked the new me.

"Of course you would want to talk about fashion," Paul scoffed while Dee simply rolled her eyes. Even after over sixteen years of watching them degrade each other and insult each other continuously I still hadn't worked out their relationship. It was weird. On the surface they seemed to hate each other but I knew it was so much more than that. My mum must have agreed with me because she smiled slightly but hid it quickly behind her hand as if she wasn't allowed to smile. I sighed.

"Anyway lets hear the punishments," Paul rubbed his hands together as if he was enjoying our pain as Seb walked into the kitchen, I avoided his gaze not entirely sure what had happened between us.

"Well that's easy," Jared spoke calmly, "Madison. No car for a month at least. That cuts off anywhere out of range of walking. And none of the other girls have a car."

"But it's only the beginning of summer vacation!" Madison exploded her eyes widening in disbelieve as she shivered slightly, "and all I did was stay out late."

"For the fifth time this month," Jared growled his eyes narrowing. With a simple flick of the wrist Emily hit him on the head with the wooden spoon she was holding to keep his anger in check. Madison slumped further down in her seat, her car was her whole life.

"That's a bit harsh," Dee noted pouting a little.

"No offence," Jared turned to look at her his nostrils flaring, "but what the hell are you even doing here?"

"My niece is in trouble," I smiled gratefully at her as she spoke, "and I wanted to spend the day with my best friend. Do you have a problem with that, _dog_?"

Sam placed a restraining hand on Jared's arm before he could push back from the table while Paul growled lowly again. Seb and I exchanged a look of amusement, they were supposed to be punishing us yet all they did was fight amongst themselves.

"Silver," my Mum's quiet voice shocked everyone into silence, "I don't know what the hell has gotten into you lately."

"Mum, I-"

"I need help sorting out the shop. How about the girls help out with that?" My mum's input was unexpected and rather than being angry at her request I found myself smiling slightly. Although Madison looked less than pleased as she pursed her lips in anger, my Mum and her had never gotten along.

"I think that's a great idea Ava," Emily smiled.

"Every Wednesday afternoon in Ava's shop all summer," Sam spoke confidently the undercurrent of alpha still evident in his tone after all those years. Sarah actually looked happy about wasting all her Wednesday afternoons in a bookshop.

"And no car," Jared reminded us. Glancing at Seb he nodded his head just slightly, I didn't need to worry, he would take me anywhere I needed to go.

"Girls I don't need to tell you that if this happens again-"

"You'll never guess what!"

We all jumped in surprise as Claire ran into the room her face flushed as she pulled Quil along behind her. She seemed to be practically bouncing with excitement but her smile faltered as she glanced around the room.

"Is this a bad time?" Claire murmured. The whole room laughed, even my mum, as Claire continued to bounce up and down.

"Actually ye-" Sam began.

"No it's a great time," Madison grinned jumping up to hug Claire tightly. Quil stood beside her scratching the back of his neck as if he was nervous. Something was going on.

"Guess what?" Claire smiled, I could of sworn I saw tears in her eyes, "I'm pregnant!"

"Oh my gosh!" Emily actually screamed dropping a plate with a smash, "my little Claire is pregnant."

Everyone began to crowd around Claire all smiles. While no one was looking I slipped out the back door, feeling suffocated. Seb followed me. As always.

"That punishment wasn't too harsh," he murmured as we sat down on the grass. His close proximity was almost unnerving, but I pushed the feeling away, wanting more than anything else in the world for things to stay the same between us. He was my best friend. And nothing more. Nothing more.

"I guess not," I muttered running a hand through my knotted curls, "and I don't mind walking. It's good exercise," I teased, easily slipping into my familiar role.

"Like I'm going to let you walk anywhere," Seb smirked taking my hand in his. Leaning into his new warmth I sighed. Everything felt so natural with Seb by my side, as always he made everything seem better.

"I don't want you to turn into a wolf," I admitted softly. The unfamiliar sun caressed my cheek as I spoke and I felt Seb stiffen beside me.

"I know you don't," Seb tilted my face up to look at him, "but I don't want you to be scared of me when I do. Okay?"

"I'll try," I whispered, "its going to be soon isn't it? Before the Summers out?"

"I think so," Seb's voice sounded almost haunted. He rubbed soothing circles on my hand as if trying to reassure me. I wondered if he was secretly scared and not letting on.

"Promise you wont forget about me?" I asked jokingly but a hint of seriousness seeped into my voice. Seb looked shocked at my question and he shook his head softly as he peered into my eyes.

"How could I ever forget you?" he grinned, "nothing will change. Well except I might have to run under your window a few times every night in wolf form."

I whacked him softly on the arm as I got comfortable in his arms again. I let go of the breath I hadn't realised I was holding.

"Do you want to be alpha?" I asked the question that had been playing on my mind since I was little. The idea of Seb being in charge had always fascinated me.

"No," he frowned, "I think I'll leave that up to Samson or you."

"What?" I spluttered caught of guard by the sudden change in conversation, "I'm not going to be a wolf." He thought I could be alpha?

"You might be. You Dad was."

Pulling my hand out of Seb's grasp I shook my head. I couldn't be a wolf. I couldn't.

"My Dad is also dead," I spat standing up blinking furiously to keep the tears at bay.

"I know," Seb also stood up and grabbed me by the shoulders, "I know. Don't cry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"I'm not crying," I snapped wiping my eyes furiously, "I just cant be a wolf. They scare me. Everything about being a wolf scares me."

"I'm sorry," Seb murmured pulling me in for a hug, "your right. Its very unlikely. Leah's the only girl wolf the tribe has had. I was just being selfish, I guess if I wanted anyone to share a mind with it would be you."

I relaxed as I listened to his motives. Of course I wasn't going to turn into a wolf. He was only joking.

"You do not want to know what goes on in my mind," I scoffed rolling my eyes.

"You would be surprised," he teased as he hugged me tighter. Looking over his shoulder I caught a glimpse of Dee standing at the kitchen window watching us, her liquid gold eyes narrowed. I followed her eyes to see the palm of Seb's hand still resting on my face, I had almost forgotten about it. Pulling reluctantly away I smiled up at Seb wondering if I would ever get used to his new height. I had always been so tiny.

"I have to go," I murmured knowing it was true. My mum would be reaching her social limitations and searching for places to hide. The blades of grass tickled my bare feet as we walked back towards the house.

"The weathers supposed to be good tomorrow. Cliff diving?"

"When have I ever missed cliff diving?" I stuck my tongue out at him as we reached the door, "besides I continue to find your lack of coordination amusing."

"Well you might be in for a surprise tomorrow," he grinned as he opened the door for me.

None of us noticed the unfamiliar smoky brown wolf watching us from the tree edge or the way its face twisted in pain. But I couldn't help wonder where Samson was?

_Thoughts?_

_I had a complete memory blank and someone pointed out to me that Seth is in fact Emily's cousin so how could he imprint on Sarah? So…I know this is terrible but for the purposes of this story Seth and Leah are not Emily's cousins because then it all gets too complicated and I would have to start again. Sorry once again I should have realised earlier and thank you to the reviewer who pointed this out._


	5. Hurting you

_Thank you so much to all of you that reviewed, its nice to hear that people are enjoying my work and it makes me write faster. Also thank you to everyone who has story alerted it also makes me happy that people want to read more chapters._

_Here's a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's daughter. Madison is Kim and Jared's. Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children._

_Here's the next chapter. Enjoy…_

_Oh and just to clear something up. No one had imprinted on Silver. ...Yet :)_

Licking the chocolate syrup from my fingers I sighed as I slouched against the kitchen counter. The sun shone in the window, and I couldn't help but tilt my face up to embrace the heat. Everything was so peaceful. So quiet. Morning was always my favourite time of the day, my Mum was normally still curled up in bed and I had full run of the house yet all I did everyday was stand and think. I thought about everything and anything. Even Seb who often burst in first thing in the morning knew to give me space. It was my time and mine alone. And I loved it.

"Morning Chica!" Dee smiled brightly as she walked through the back door. My peace was interrupted, as it often was with Dee around, but she had always been an exception to my rule. Her skin sparkled in the sunshine, like millions of little gems were sprinkled all over her body. Admitably she looked even more beautiful in the sun, not that I was ever going to tell her that. As always she was way to hyper for the morning, I wondered briefly whether she had been a morning person when she was human. Probably.

"Did you have a nice breakfast?" I scrunched up my face thinking about Dee bending over some animal corpse. Swallowing loudly I focused my attention on the floor while Dee just stared at me. As always my curiosity had surprised her, I asked questions that no one else thought to, even though I hated anyone asking questions about me. It was why we had grown so close over the years. In a way she was almost a second mother. The whole vampire thing had never bothered me like it seemed to bother the rest of my family. It seemed almost…natural?

When I was younger there had often been nights where Dee had tucked me into bed and kissed me lightly on the head while my Mum lay unmoving in her own bed, staring at nothing as she cried silent tears. Then there had been the days on the beach in the pouring rain where we would just sit and eat ice cream. And the first morning she had forced coffee down my throat on the day of an important exam. And more recently the days where she had struggled to help me with my homework and get me interested in fashion. But then she had to go. She _always_ had to go. I swallowed a lump in my throat.

My heart ached for a moment but I plastered a smile on my face careful, as always, not to show my true feelings. It was easier that way. I had learned to live in the moment. Life was just too damn short. My Dad was the perfect example of that.

"It was rather tasty," she bared her fangs as she spoke answering the question I had almost forgotten about, "but I hear there are some tasty wolfs in these parts."

"Shut up Aunt Dee," I laughed hitting her lightly on the arm, careful not to hurt myself. Turning, I filled the sink up with water as I surveyed the many plates littered around the kitchen. Dee always seemed to make a mess of the place, although she didn't even eat. Running my hand under the tap I waited for the water to get warm.

"Come _on_," Dee smirked, "they are all like big chunks of meat. So juicy, and well….just fine pieces of ass really."

"Ewww," I wrinkled my nose, "that's my uncles and cousins you are talking about. That's just gross."

"You sound like your mother when she was your age," Dee shook her head thoughtfully a small smile on her face, "but Seb _isn't_ your cousin. What's going on between you two? You seemed pretty cosy yesterday."

Flushing a deep red I sighed in impatience still waiting for the water to heat up while I avoided Dee's inquisitive gaze. She had only been around a day and yet as always she was asking questions, just like Samson. It was the one thing that had always irritated me about Dee. About Samson too.

"He's my best friend," I chewed on my lip as I remembered the almost kiss the day before, "you know that. We've been friends my whole life. And _just _friends."

"So the chemistry sizzling between you two was just my imagination then was it?" Aunt Dee rolled her eyes as she strode towards me, "cut the crap honey and just kiss him. He's gagging for it."

"I d-don't know wh-what y-your talking-," I stuttered.

"Are you trying to corrupt my daughter again Dee?" my Mum spoke quietly as she shuffled into the kitchen a mug of coffee clutched in her bony hands. I wondered how long she had been listening to our conversation. Purple bruising was visible under her eyes but at least she was smiling. The dressing gown I had bought her years previously was hanging off her tiny frame. As always she seemed so fragile. So breakable.

"That's what aunties are for," Dee winked at me while my Mum laughed lightly, her hair escaping wildly from the messy bun on top of her head.

"I was just trying to get her to admit her feelings for Samson," Delilah spoke conversationally while my face flamed an even brighter red. I didn't want to worry my mum with such trivial nonsense, she had enough on her mind.

"And did she?" my Mum glanced at me while she reached for the jar of coffee, "admit her feelings that is."

"No," Aunt Dee shook her head almost mockingly, "she's still in denial."

"Still?" my Mum raised her eyebrows at me as she shovelled three spoonfuls of sugar into her mug.

"Mum!" I cried covering my ears. Their banter would have made me smile if it had not been at the expense of me. Frowning my mum reached out to feel the water I was running.

"Holy Crap!" my mum shrieked flinching backwards, "that's bloody roasting. What are you doing Silver?"

Looking down at my hand in alarm I noticed the red tinge that covered my skin but I didn't feel anything, the water still felt lukewarm to me. A terrible feeling warmed its way into my stomach as I snatched my hand back. Dee raised her eyebrows at me while my Mum's eyes flickered over my body as if searching for something.

"I didn't realise?" I said lamely trying to smooth my face into a neutral expression as several explanations ran through my head. Maybe it hadn't warmed up until a second before my Mum put her hand under it? Or maybe, Dee's taunting had winded me up so much that I just hadn't noticed the temperature? That was it!

"I was just distracted," I spoke loudly trying to fill the awful silence in the room. Dee's lips were pursed while my Mum's face had paled even more than usual.

"Yes," my mum said weakly, "t-that must have been it?"

"Of course," Dee's voice was stronger but still her narrowed eyes remained on my face. I felt like I was under inspection. The air around me seemed to grow warmer, sweltering almost. I tried to remember how to breath in and out while panic consumed me.

"Y-you don't have a temperature do you?" my mum's voice was barely above a whisper yet I didn't even have to strain to hear it. I flinched away from her outstretched hand and hit my hip off the counter, I had to bite my lip to keep myself from crying out in pain.

"No," I spoke in a monotone, "I'm perfectly fine. Fine."

"Are you-" my Mm began but she was cut off by a high pitched cry and the wailing creak of the front door as it swung open.

"Silver!" Madison ran into the kitchen and grabbed my arm tightly, her face flushed, "there both wolfs_. Both _of them."

At first my mind didn't process what she was saying. All I saw was white. A bright, blinding white like the colour of the wall in the garage before Seb and I splattered it with paint. My whole mind seemed to shut down as if to block out any thoughts. All I was aware of was Madison's long fingernails digging into my arm, probably drawing blood. Her words bounced off the walls of my head. I sucked in a sharp breath.

Seb.

_My_ Seb.

Tearing my arm from Madison's grasp I seemed to growl slightly as I ran for the door, my breaths coming out in short gasps. Grabbing my bike from the garden I cycled up the familiar hill ignoring the burning sensation in my legs. Briefly I was aware of cars swerving out of my way and people's shouts. But I ignored it all. All that mattered was him. I had to make sure he was alright.

The wind slapped me in the face as I continued to cycle. Vaguely I was aware that I had left the main road behind and the blur of trees passed me as I cycled down the familiar dirt trodden track. With one last push I forced myself onwards my eyes routinely scanning the woods around me for wolfs, but unusually there was nothing. As I cycled up the driveway to my second home I forced back the tears trying to be strong. I had to be strong. I had promised him I wasn't going to be scared of him. I had promised. I always kept my promises.

"Seb!" I cried throwing my bike to the ground and running towards the front door. Unusually it was locked.

"Seb!" I screamed out again, my voice raw, as I knocked hard on the door. My eyes reflexively scanned the surrounding forest wondering if he had been able to change back. Aware of the pain he must be in, I flinched.

I almost sobbed in relief as Uncle Sam opened the door, but before I could barge by him he put his arm up to block my way.

"Sam?" I whispered registering the tension in the air. Everything in the house was silent. Too silent. Even the wind seemed to still. Something was wrong.

"He doesn't want to see you," his voice was sad, almost as if he didn't want to deliver the news.

I almost laughed. Almost until I saw the pity in Sam's eyes and the slight tremble of the retired alpha as he stood in the doorway. I had grown up with Sam, he was almost like a father figure.

"What?" my voice was hollow as I tried to duck under Sam's arm, "of course Seb wants to see me."

Seb _always_ wanted to see me. Even on the first day of high school when he had made new friends he always made time for me, always sat beside me at lunch. He was the one who was _always _there. When my Mum was having a particularly bad day and Delilah was out of town he would arrive around with Ben and Jerries and do everything in his power to make me laugh. He was _always_ there.

"I'm sorry," Sam shook his head slowly as if to emphasise his point, " he asked specifically not to see you."

I felt as though I had been punched in the stomach. All the air seemed to leave my lungs and I struggled to stay upright as Sam began to close the door slightly. Everything seemed to spin around me.

"But he promised," my voice sounded weak as I stumbled a step backwards. Only a day earlier he had promised nothing would change between us when he turned. He had promised everything would always be the same. Always.

"I really am sorry, Silver," Sam's face seemed to twist in pain as he spoke, "I'm sure he'll come around soon. This is a difficult time for my sons."

Stumbling another step backwards I shook my head furiously from side to side as if in denial. My whole world seemed to crumble around me. My heart thumped loudly in my chest. The rain began to drizzle around me.

"He promised," I repeated softly.

Sam looked as if he was about to step forwards but then stopped himself.

"I'll phone your Uncle Paul to come and get you," he shouted as the rain began to fall heavier around me. The rain mixed with my tears but I tried to stay strong. I had always been strong. I was Silver. Nothing phased me. I was my father's daughter.

"Don't bother," I spat my voice laced with anger. Turning around I kept myself composed until I heard the snap of the door behind me. Seeing red I kicked out at Seb's familiar truck in the driveway. The truck I had hid in during family parties, the truck I had laughed in and cried in. My head snapped up as I noticed the big dent my foot had created. Choking out a sob I ran out of the driveway and towards the cliff.

What the hell was happening to me?

_Thoughts?_


	6. Meeting you

_Thank you so much to all of you that reviewed, its nice to hear that people are enjoying my work and it makes me write faster. Also thank you to everyone who has story alerted it also makes me happy that people want to read more chapters._

_Here's a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's daughter. Madison is Kim and Jared's. Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children._

_Here's the next chapter. Enjoy…_

"Have we got everything yet?" Dee whined picking at her fingernails as she scrunched up her nose, "I'm bored and this whole place stinks of dogs." My Mum and I shared a look. Sighing heavily I tried to find the energy to put one foot after the other.

It had been a whole week since I had spoken to Seb. A whole fricken week. Normally, we couldn't last one hour without talking to each other. I missed his warm hugs, and really bad jokes. But most of all I just missed him. His presence and how he could make me smile just by entering a room. Stupidly I hadn't realised what I had until I had lost it. The story of my life.

"Ice Cream?" my Mum glanced at me out of the corner of her eye.

"Chocolate ice cream," I corrected her thinking about the many tubs of Ben and Jerries that I had eaten my way through in one week alone. I was going to have to get a job of my own if I wanted to keep up my ice cream eating habits. But Ben and Jerry had become my new best friends along with Madison, she had been my rock without Seb nearby, she was also too scared to visit the Uley household. Although unlike me she was scared of Samson's rejection and what she would do if the 'love of her life' imprinted on some 'stupid blonde bimbo with not enough common sense to string together a decent conversation.' Her words. Not mine.

"Ice cream aisle it is then," my Mum smiled slightly while Dee let out a huff of annoyance.

"Well I'm going for a run," she moaned, "meet you back at the house. You both know I hate shopping-"

"Unless it's for clothes," I finished for her in a monotone pushing our trolley in the direction of the ice cream, my mum hot on my heels. Dee muttered a curse under her breath before she stormed out of the shop, several men following her with their eyes all the way out. My throat automatically tightened as I spotted Seth and Sarah come through the door laughing manically together. Ducking my head I walked quicker making sure they wouldn't see me.

I had been avoiding all of the wolfs. I was adamant that Seb would not see my puffy red eyes and lack of happiness through his pack brother's eyes. So however much it pained me to do so I had to avoid Sarah despite her countless phone calls, because wherever Sarah went Seth followed. She was so oblivious to his adoration of her that it made me physically sick. For the first time in my life I wished for that kind of affection to be shown to me.

My whole life I had been against the phenomenon of imprinting and I openly expressed my views much to the glee of my Uncle Paul and the to the distaste of most of the other wolfs and their wives, namely Kim. The imprint bond was what had left my mother so broken after my Dad's death and I'd never really been able to see through the haze that covered my eyes. But the knowledge that Seth imprinted on Sarah and that Madison would most likely be imprinted on by Samson led me to the realisation that I was going to be alone. Alone. The thought haunted me.

I thought maybe about moving to Paris with Dee or running away altogether but then I thought of my Mum, the devastation it would cause her and realised that if I left La Push it would break her completely. And I would never be selfish enough to ask her to leave La Push, it was her home, the place that reminded her of my Dad. I would just have to suffer in silence. As always.

"Silver?" my Mum's voice was insistent as if trying to gain my attention, "are you alright?"

Glancing down at the metal handle of the trolley I noticed the indentation of my fingers where I had been clutching it hard. My strength was growing. Swallowing loudly I gave my Mum a brief nod before pushing forwards my head thumping loudly.

"How many tubs?" my Mum asked lifting the lid of the freezer. Blinking several times I glanced up into my Mum's worried grey eyes as she stood waiting for my answer. All week she had been attentive, it was what I had wished for practically my whole life, but at the particular moment I wanted nothing else but to suffer in silence. The way I always had.

"Ten," I mumbled lowly, "maybe-"

"Ava," a voice called making me jump in fright, "Ava, is that really you?"

The man walking towards us was a stranger to me but my Mum's eyes were filled with recognition and an expression I couldn't quite place as she hastily tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. I noticed his height first, although he was small compared to the wolfs I had grown up around he was taller than an average sized man and his intense blue eyes made him look almost exotic as he strode eagerly towards my Mum.

"Ian?" my Mum's voice was coloured with disbelief and tremoured slightly as if she was nervous. Ian's dark coloured hair fell naturally over one of his eyes and his smile was extremely wide, so much like Seb's that my mouth went dry. Juggling a tub of ice cream in my hand I watched as my Mum let herself be hugged by the man she had called Ian. My mouth dropped open in shock, physical contact, especially with men was not my Mum's strongest point.

"What the hell happened to you?" Ian reached out almost naturally to touch my mum's face but she stumbled backwards as if burnt. Reaching out with my free hand I steadied her while her face flushed a subtle pink. I flinched as the man turned his eyes on me and I heard Seth's booming laughter from the other side of the shop. I missed the pack. Damn Seb.

"You look so much like your Mum when she was younger," Ian's voice was quiet, so unlike the rowdy men's voices that I was used to that I automatically put my guard in place.

"Excuse me. But who are you?" I snapped as my Mum leant against one of the freezers looking a little breathless. My tongue darted out to lick my lips as Seth's laughter got nearer.

"I am-," he coughed a little uncomfortably, "I mean I was your Mum's friend from school back in the day. I went away to medical school. But now I'm back."

"You're back," my Mum muttered mostly to herself but Ian nodded in response. He was an old school friend he claimed, but I had a feeling there was so much more history to him and my Mum than he was letting on. And I did not like secrets.

I wondered how much my Mum had changed since the years that Ian had known her. Of course I had seen photos and I knew my Dad's death had made her too skinny and she had lost some of the laughter lines around her mouth, but I knew she was still as beautiful as she had always been and I didn't like the way Ian was looking at her. Like he wanted her. Like he had always wanted her.

"We have to go," I said firmly flinging the tubs of ice cream in the trolley as I pulled lightly on the Mum's arm, careful not to hurt her with my new found strength.

"Wait," Ian's voice was almost desperate as he placed a hand on my arm, "how's Embry?" Taking a deep breath I narrowed my eyes as I snatched my arm away from him.

"My Dad's dead," I spat. My words seemed to almost knock the wind out of him and I watched as his eyes widened in realisations before they flickered to my Mum, but instead of the sympathy I had expected to see, I saw understanding and adoration. It was obvious he cared for her.

"Come on Mum," I said again, more forcefully.

"I-I just," my Mum glanced down at me her eyes almost pitying, "just give me a moment with Ian? _Please_?"

Grabbing a tub of ice cream from the trolley I stormed towards the exit but not before growling a warning at Ian. My Mum was fragile and I didn't want him hurting her.

"My Mum will pay for this in a minute," I told the cashier on the way out of the door before grabbing a spoon. She simply nodded and blew a pink bubble before flicking to the next page in the magazine which she was reading.

Collapsing onto the familiar bench out of the store I rolled up my jeans and stuck my legs out into the sunshine before shovelling some chocolate ice cream in my mouth.

"Silver?" a soft voice asked, "is that you?"

Wiping the ice cream from around my mouth I looked up to see Emily shuffling from foot to foot, she looked weary and the many shopping bags littered around her feet looked heavy.

"Let me help you with those," I grumbled avoiding her eyes contact as I stood up. Instead of answering me like I had expected her eyes flickered up and down my body her face hard.

"You look terrible," she muttered running a hand through her hair as she pulled me back down to sit on the bench.

"Thanks Em," I muttered sourly looking up into the sun. Without a word she took my hand in hers squeezing it tightly. I bit back a sob.

"He misses you," her voice was barely above a whisper but it made me flinch all the same. Her words seemed to break my heart a little more.

"He has a funny way of showing it," I snapped wrenching my hand away from Emily's, "no phone calls, no visits, not even one lousy letter."

"You have to understand," Emily's voice was desperate and I could see tears shining in her eyes, "he's scared. We're all scared."

"That's why I wanted to be there for him," I grumbled wrapping my arms tightly around my stomach wondering distantly what was taking my Mum so long.

"Its not being a wolf he's scared of, he quite likes that part" beside me Emily took a deep breath, "it's the imprinting."

"The imprinting?" I croaked aware that my frame had started to tremble slightly. In truth I had never even thought about it. Seb imprinting, he had always been a free spirit. I just couldn't imagine him being bound to someone for the rest of his existence.

"He's scared that if he does imprint on you it will change everything. But he doesn't want anyone else to imprint on you either, and after the almost kiss the other day I know you are both experiencing new feelings for each other. He doesn't know what he wants."

I was silent, trying to keep control of my shaking body without alerting Emily to the changes in me. I didn't even question how she knew about the almost kiss. If Seb imprinted on someone else every moment I spent with him he wouldn't be truly there, I knew that from experience. I would no longer have my best friend. But I couldn't shake of the feeling that if he did imprint on me, everything would be perfect, the way it was always supposed to be. My heart stuttered in my chest. Maybe I did love Seb as more than a friend. Maybe I had wanted him to kiss me. Maybe he loved me too?

"Enough is enough," Emily's voice was adamant as she grabbed my arm again, startling me, "your coming home with me. We are going to sort this out once and for all."

My face drained of colour as I stumbled behind Emily towards her truck, all of her shopping still sitting on the sidewalk. Whatever happened at the Uley's was going to determine the rest of my life. And at the back of my mind I hoped fate was in a good mood, because I needed all the help I could get.

_Thoughts?_


	7. Not you

_Wow! Over 100 reviews, that is insane! Thank you all so, so much. I always love reading what you all think and you are continuously giving me ideas. Once again a quick reminder: Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children. Madison is Kim and Jared's. And Silver is Ava's._

_Here we go with another chapter. Enjoy…_

Taking a deep breath I peeked around the doorway of the garage trying to quiet my racing heart. The first thing I noticed was his height. Seb had always been tall but the new broad set of his shoulders and the way he stood back to survey a painting he was working on seemed to emphasise his new height. If I stood beside him I knew I would seem tiny and breakable. He looked much taller than my Uncle Paul and at least a whole head bigger than his own Dad. His hair was cut shorter than I remembered, although not shaved like Samson's which I was thankful for. I had always loved Seb's hair. I loved running my hands through it and the grumble of satisfaction that came from his chest as I did.

"I can smell you," he murmured quietly not turning around. His voice was deeper than I remembered, more masculine. He sounded more like Samson.

Taking a tiny step forward I watched as he clenched and unclenched his hands into fists. The stiff set of his shoulders and the straightness of his neck warned me of his frustration. I was scared of the changes to him I would see when he eventually turned around. I hoped his smile would be the same. My smile.

"What do I smell like?" I wondered, my voice breaking a little bit and giving away my nervousness. I never had been able to hide my feelings in front of Seb, it was one of my many weaknesses. The hairs on the back of his neck seemed to stand up as my voice bounced off the surrounding walls of the garage.

Glancing around I noticed all of the walls were paint splattered and tubs of paint lay scattered randomly around the room. A lump formed in my throat as I realised he had been having intense paint therapy sessions without me. It was the least of my worries but somehow that tiny gesture stung. Paint therapy had always been something we did together.

"Like mud-"

"Mud?" I cut him off before he could continue, automatically sliding into my role of his best friend before I remembered the situation we were in. He curled and uncurled his fists again before he continued. I couldn't believe I smelled like mud.

"Like the fresh smell of the mud in the forest after it rains," he clarified, "and paint, that's probably because of all the time you spend in here," his voice turned gruffer, "and strangely a little like chocolate ice cream. And coffee."

I muffled a laugh behind my hand as I took another step into the garage thinking about the many tubs of Ben and Jerries I had managed to consume over the days without Seb. Thinking about this made the anger I had felt, the rejection, resurface. I paused mid-step my heart clenching in my chest.

"You promised nothing would change," I muttered staring down at my scuffed converse, the paint fumes overwhelming me. He shuffled from foot to foot but still didn't turn around, he cleared his throat loudly.

"I'm sorry," Seb's voice was soft, like the old Seb, "I really am sorry. It was all just so overwhelming and then I thought of you and-" he stopped abruptly running a hand through his hair. From outside I heard the reluctant grumble of a car as it started up and the slam of a door.

"You thought of me…and?" I took another step forward my hands itching to touch him, to make sure he was real. More than anything in the world I wanted a hug, where I could hide my head in the crook of his neck and forget everything.

"Well actually," his arms lay loosely at his sides, "you helped me change back."

My mouth went dry, like sandpaper as I took yet another step forward narrowly missing a tub of green paint. I knew from the wolf's stories that thinking of something or someone which brought you happiness helped you shift forms. Jared often joked that all my Uncle Paul ever thought about was food.

"And that scared me," Seb admitted, "I love you Silver, but I don't know whether I love you like a friend or something else. So seeing you scares the hell of me. If I imprint will everything change between us? And if I don't will someone else? I don't know what I want," his voice lowered to a quiet whisper, "I was selfish. You're my best friend and I should have seen you. But I was selfish. I _am_ selfish."

"No your not," I spoke softly grabbing onto his arm. He whirled around to face me his light green eyes wide. I clutched onto his arm harder as he looked into my own eyes.

And nothing happened.

Of course I still felt the same adoration I always felt, the overwhelming urge to grab his hand and never let go and the desperate need to make him laugh. As well as the underlying turmoil in my belly which urged me to kiss him. But I had always felt those things. Maybe not always. But as I had developed, as Seb and I had grown up together those feelings had developed. But there was no silver thread between us tying us together, there was no magic. He hadn't imprinted.

I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach, like all the air had left my lungs and I couldn't breath properly. But I plastered a smile onto my face trying to force down the tears as Seb continued to search my face for what he was looking for, but we both knew that he would never find it. I wasn't his soul mate. His other half.

"Oh well," I forced my voice to sound happy as I spoke, "I guess you had nothing to worry about then. Apparently fate likes us just the way we are. And a promise is a promise Seb Uley. Just because your some magical wolf now doesn't mean you can pause your best friend duties-"

An overwhelming amount of gratitude crashed over me as Seb pulled me urgently to his chest wrapping his arms around me to stop me mid ramble. Closing my eyes I hid my head in his shirt as I breathed in his new smell of the forest. He always knew what to do. Always.

"I've missed you," he mumbled pressing his lips against my hair as I trembled in his arms. I couldn't find the strength to answer as his arms tightened around me. All the fight, all the anger seemed to have drained form my body in an instant.

"I promised nothing would change," he continued his voice fierce, "and nothing will."

I wished more than anything that everything could rewind to that day in the garage where we almost kissed and erase it from memory. It didn't matter. It would never matter. Because Seb wasn't mine. I already dreaded the day when he would imprint on someone. The day when I would be shifted to the side. Forgotten. That moment in the garage had given me false hope. I would never be his.

"Nothing will change," I said instead, trying to be strong. I would be by his side while he needed me. I would paint with him and laugh with him and joke with him. But I wouldn't kiss him, I would push any feelings other than friendship to the side. And when the day came when he imprinted, I would let him go, because that was the right thing to do. And I loved him to much to make him choose.

I tried not to frown as Seb took a step backwards from our hug, his light green eyes still watching me carefully. I felt unusually exposed under his gaze.

"You look like crap," he told me as he lifted a strand of hair away from my face. Wrapping my arms tightly around my body I tried to hold onto some of his warmth as I surveyed the dark circles under his eyes and the faint scratches on his arms.

"You don't look too great yourself," I stuck my tongue out at him and darted out of his way as he tried to flick some paint in my direction. It was just like old times.

"Well I have an excuse unlike some," Seb smirked, "I was running around in my wolf form all night and-"

"All night?" I exclaimed. No wonder he was so tired. Briefly I wondered why he wasn't in his bed sleeping. But then painting always had helped him take his mind of things. He was the most talented person I knew. I was proud of him.

"We need to learn the ropes. Patrolling, how to cope with a vampire and all that shit." He actually looked animated as he talked while I tried to control my body as it began to tremble. I clenched my hands into fists as I tried to distract myself. The idea of his facing some leech seemed to haunt me, I was terrified of losing him.

"How's Samson?" I asked. Seb's expression darkened and he narrowed his eyes. It wasn't the reaction I had been expecting.

"I wouldn't know," he spat glaring at one of the paint splattered walls. My eyes flickered up and down his shaking body. I was too close to him. I had been taught better than to wind up a new wolf, it would end up in disaster. Emily's face ruined by scars flashed in my head.

"Calm down," I whispered running my hand up and down his shaking arm my heart thumping loudly in my chest.

"I'm sorry. Samson's a touchy subject," his shaking increased as drops of sweat began to appear on my brow, "he's blocked off his thoughts. _Completely_. I don't know how he's doing it. Dad says Leah's the only person he's seen with such secure thoughts. When we're coordinating or we smell a leech he's there but otherwise he's not and yet he can hear every single one of my fricken thoughts. Its not fair. He's already so much better at this wolf crap than me. He's the golden boy. As usual."

"Samson _please_," I begged watching as his form began to blur slightly. Glancing at the doorway I knew I would never be able to make it that far before he phased.

"_Please_," I repeated my voice high. He glanced down at me as if registering my presence for the first time. I watched as he breathed deeply through his nose. His shaking began to slow and I smiled slightly.

"I'm so sorry," he spoke through gritted teeth, "I promise I will never lose it like that again. I c-could have hurt you."

"I knew you wouldn't have," I murmured quietly continuing to run my hand up and down his arm. He pulled me closer into his chest again and I melted into his warmth.

"Lets go get some food, shall we?"

Ten minutes later I squeezed Seb's hand as we walked through the backdoor. I knew he felt bad but I couldn't take it if he stayed away from me again. I needed him. I needed him like I needed air to breath.

"I knew you would arrive looking for food sooner or later," Emily turned to smile widely at us, her eyes immediately flickering to our interlocked hands.

"Did you-" she began her voice sounding a little breathless.

"No," Seb cut her off abruptly letting go of my hand, "I didn't imprint."

"Oh," Emily's smile slipped off her face for a fraction of a second but I caught it none the less. Once again I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach. I stood alone in the middle of the room while Seb sat at the table. Alone as always.

"Mum-" Samson's voice paused mid sentence as I turned to face him. Unusually the warmth of his voice seemed to worm its way into my head and my heart squeezed in my chest. His dark green eyes connected with mine and the whole world seemed to dull around me as I gazed into his eyes. His eyes seemed to be drinking in every inch of my body as if memorizing every spot on my face and every curve in my body. I felt unusually small.

Distantly I was aware of the slam of a door and a quiet gasp.

In my mind I could almost see the silver thread weaving between Samson and I. Connecting us. His hand was outstretched as if he ached to touch me and his face was full of tenderness, but as he stepped towards me everything seemed to come crashing around me.

A wolf howled in the distance and I finally noticed the empty seat where Seb had been sitting.

Samson had imprinted. On _me_.

Turning, I ran out of the door shaking slightly as silent tears ran down my cheeks. I heard a pained cry in the distance and then another howl.

"Oh crap," Emily's voice carried towards me in the wind.

He was the wrong one. The wrong brother. The wrong twin.

Without thinking I ran into the forest the twigs snapping continuously underneath my feet. I felt numb. My thoughts were consumed with thoughts of my best friend and my imprint.

He was the wrong one.

He wasn't the one who had taught me how to swim. He wasn't the one who had made me laugh until I cried. He wasn't the one who I could talk to for an endless amount of hours. He wasn't the one who knew how to make me the perfect cup of coffee.

He wasn't the boy who made my heart skip a beat when he smiled. He wasn't the boy who flung paint at walls. He wasn't the boy who held my heart.

He was Madison's boy. Not mine.

I began shaking uncontrollably, wailing at the sky.

_Not mine_.

Distantly I was aware of the flashes of pain that embraced me as my muscles began to stretch. I pressed my lips together to stop myself from screaming out as my back arched and my clothes ripped. Everything seemed sharper as one final blast of pain shot through me.

And then I was a wolf.

_Thoughts?_


	8. Hearing you

**Once again a quick reminder: Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children. Madison is Kim and Jared's. And Silver is Ava's. As always thank you all so much for all your reviews, they are what keep me going.**

_He was Madison's boy. Not mine._

_I began shaking uncontrollably, wailing at the sky._

_Not mine._

_Distantly I was aware of the flashes of pain that embraced me as my muscles began to stretch. I pressed my lips together to stop myself from screaming out as my back arched and my clothes ripped. Everything seemed sharper as one final blast of pain shot through me._

_And then I was a wolf._

Thunderous howls seemed to engulf the air around me- it was a while before I realised it was me making the noise. My muscles seemed to have been stretched to within an inch of breaking and a dull ache seemed to swallow my whole body. As I tried to frown my abnormally pointed teeth ground together creating a high pitched whining sound. I tried to scream with terror but all that I managed was another pathetic howl.

I was a wolf. The one thing I had dreaded most in the world. Fear seemed to consume me. I didn't want it. There was no escape, my whole life was going to be dictated from the moment I changed back. What if I ended up dead like my Dad? My heart twisted painfully in my chest. I panted as I shook my head from side to side. I couldn't be a wolf. I couldn't be.

_Silver! Silver?_

Everything around me seemed sharper than humanly possible, I could see each drop of rain as it landed on the forest floor around me and the tiny insects crawling amongst the mud. Trying to move through my pain I realised I could hear the distant grumbles of cars from the faraway road and I could smell the faint smell of bacon from a nearby house. What the hell was happening to me?

_Fuck! Silver, is that you?_

I tried to breath deeply as a picture of Samson's stunned expression flashed in my head. My heart ached as I felt the air shift around me. Voices shouted at me from every corner of my mind, I fought the urge to bang my head against a tree. Glancing down I noticed my small paws leaving tracks in my wake and the white colour of my fur. I realised with shock that my whole body was covered in white fur. I scoffed, wasn't white supposed to be a sign of innocence? Of purity?

_Silver? Answer me please?_

Suddenly I was bombarded with images of myself, but like I had never seen me before. I was leaning against a paint splattered wall my curls escaping my bun as I panted heavily, my eyes full of mischief- I looked desirable. Another howl sounded in the distance that did not belong to me. An image of me curled up in a chair with my lips pursed as I read a book seemed to drown me. Then there was me laughing covered head to toe in pancake batter. And me with tears falling down my face as I sat beside my Mum's bed. The memories were not mine. I didn't understand what was going on. I gasped desperately for air to breath.

_Stop!_

Immediately the memories of those around me halted and I almost sobbed in relief. I would have recognised that commanding voice anywhere. Uncle Paul?

From further away I heard rabid snarls and the snap of a tree as it fell to the ground. What was happening?

_Seb. Samson. Stop. Go home. Tell your Mum to bring clothes._

My heart stilled in my chest as I realised I had been sharing my thoughts with Samson and Seb. Without conscious thought my mind flickered to the day in the garage where Seb's lips were inches from mine and the desire that had flowed throughout me. I tried to stop my flow of thoughts but the rejection of Seb not imprinting on me seemed to coarse through my blood and then Samson's hard face softened by adoration as he gazed at me. More snarls sounded in the distance. I was hurting them. It struck me that my thoughts were never going to be mine again. A softer whine sounded from nearby as I tried unsuccessfully to sob.

And then nothing.

Tilting my head up to embrace the rain falling from the sky I caught the raindrops on my tongue as I paced up and down. I was thankful for the silence in my head.

_Silver? Are you alright darling?_

The unusually soft nature of Paul's voice brought tears to my eyes. He had never been one for showing sentiment or emotion. Sniffing I awkwardly lay down in front of a tree, my nose burned.

_That will be Dee's scent. Don't worry you'll get used to it._

Dee smelled like _that_? The smell seemed to burn my whole body and made me stand instantly straighter as if poised for a fight. Wrinkling up my nose I laid my head on my paws wondering if there was a way to reverse time. I wanted nothing more than this to all be a stupid dream, any second Seb would wake me up where I had fell asleep in the garage as he painted. Everything would be back to normal, the way everything was _supposed_ to be.

_I only wish it were that simple. Your surprisingly calm considering everything. A lot like your Dad actually._

I stiffened as I was pulled into Paul's thoughts. I bit down hard on my bottom lip. Cleary I could see a silvery wolf with black spots pacing up and down the forest floor shaking the rain from it's fur in annoyance. Choking back a sob I tried desperately to push Paul's memories away. I didn't want to be reminded of what I'd lost, what I would never have. I let out a strangled howl, his memories were too vivid, too real.

Stretching my legs I pushed them forwards as I began to run gritting my teeth together. My surroundings past in a blur of green and I had no idea how fast I was going. I whined softly. Nothing was ever going to be the same again.

_Silver. Crap. I'm sorry. Come back._

I kept running.

_Thoughts?_

_I'm sorry for this shockingly short chapter, but school is literally taking over my life right now but I didn't want to leave you all without anything. I hoped you enjoyed it despite its shortness, I promise a longer chapter next time._

_I was thinking maybe I could do the next chapter in another POV before going back to Silver. Who's POV would you like to see. Madison? Seb? Samson? Sarah? Ava? Its up to you. Until next time x_


	9. Fighting you

_Thank you all so much for your reviews. I am so sorry for any typos in this chapter but I am just too tired to check over it. Samson had the most requests so here is his POV but I promise to visit others in the future._

**Samson**

Growling I ducked as Seb ran towards me his figure blurred slightly. Pulling on my shorts I flinched as I heard Silver's pained howl from nearby. Branches snapped under my feet as Seb continued to surround me his green eyes fierce, I could see the glint of hatred shining in them. Rain fell around us soaking my bare chest as my breaths came out in gasps.

"How could you?" Seb snarled curling his fists at his side, "you never liked her, you never held her when she cried. Silver is _mine_."

She was mine not his. He had never cared what I thought. I knew he saw me watching her over the years. Even before the imprint I had watched with fascination as Silver chewed on her bottom lip while reading and the way she scrunched up her nose in frustration when a lock of her curled hair got in her way. Seb knew I cared for her. Seb had always known. Seb had done everything in his power to keep her away from me. She didn't know me despite the time we had spent together. Not properly.

I spat out a curse word as he slammed me against a nearby tree, my shoulder snapped painfully and I clamped my eyes shut as I heard Silver's howls become fainter. What the hell was happening to her? Was she hurt? Damn Paul for ordering to stay away, if only I had been strong enough to challenge him, I knew it wouldn't be too long before I could. Before i became alpha, like i was destined to do.

"She is not your possession," I barked as Seb narrowed his eyes at me. For a brief second nostalgia consumed me. Never would I have thought Seb and I would be separated so severely. As twins we had always shared a special bond but that bond seemed to have scattered into a million unfixable pieces the moment I laid eyes on Silver, not that I would want to change that for the world. She was my life. My existence for living and if he hurt her in any way he would have to face me along with any other jerks who tried their luck. I growled lowly.

"Of course she's mine," Seb's voice cracked as he continued to walk towards me, "as soon as she could walk she was following me around desperate to be my friend. We are made for each other, even you know that. You saw her thoughts, felt her desire. Its me she wants not you. _Not you_!"

My heart clenched tightly in my chest and I couldn't stop myself from pouncing forward and pressing Seb against a tree, we both knew I was so much stronger than him.

"What you going to do?" Seb's tongue darted out to lick his lips, his eyes feral, "you going to hit me Samson? You going to make sure I never walk again?"

Drawing my fist back I let out a scream of frustration as I punched at the bark narrowly above Seb's head. He just smirked at me as I cradled my hand to my chest, I knew it would heal momentarily.

Seb's words seemed to engulf my brain, haunt me. I listened for Silver in the surrounding forest but I could hear nothing but Paul's shallow gasps for breath as he ran. I knew what it was like to transform the first time, the pain that seemed to capture you in a never ending mist and the awkward control of your new limbs. It was a horrible experience, something I would never want to relive in a thousand years. But even through all that pain Silver had thought about Seb and the want that had coursed through her was almost unbearable to witness. She wanted him, it had always been him. Never me.

She hated me. Silver heated me. My imprint hated me. I ground my teeth together in frustration as Seb continued to peer at me curiously.

"You know its true," Seb's voice was almost pitying, "she will _never_ love you."

I fought against the twitch in my hand that wanted to cover my own flesh and blood in bruises, that was the wolf inside of me eager for a fight but as always I pushed it away. Ever since the day I had first turned wolf, even before I had imprinted on Silver the urge to hold her in my hands and never let go was overwhelming. The day when I had first phased silently from the forest edge I had watched as she reached eagerly for my brothers hand with a smile on her face- a smile that she only ever gave him- and I'd had to restrain myself. I didn't like being a monster. I wanted her to love me, but I knew that challenge was going to be hard if not near impossible. I wanted desperately for her to smile at me like she had at Seb.

"She will love me eventually," I swallowed loudly as Seb tensed, "she may not love me like you want her to love you but I would be happy being her brother, her best friend."

"You say that now," Seb snapped, "but we both know that's not true, we have seen enough memories and read enough thoughts to know it never works out like that. You cant control the urges your wolf has, you may pretend you are alright with just being her friend but we both know you will ache to hold her and kiss her-"

"I never said I wouldn't feel like that," I interrupted stiffly, "and believe me I will try everything in my power to get her to fall for me but it is Silver's choice and I would never do anything to hurt her. Ever."

"And you think I would?" Seb roared. His fist connected with my jaw before I had time to move out of the way, pain engulfed me in a flash of white light. In retaliation I raised my leg quickly to kick him in the stomach.

"Fate had a seriously messed up sense of humour. Silver will never fall for you. You are the complete opposite of everything she wants or needs." Seb swiped at my face again as I stumbled backwards, I frowned as he tried to secure his hand around my throat.

"And your exactly what she needs are you?" I spat out blood, "an over emotional wolf who ignored her for days on end out of fear of being rejected? Did you even see how thin she had gotten? The purple bruising under her eyes? You don't deserve that from her."

"What about Madison eh?" Seb barked as he pushed me towards the ground his hand still firmly locked around my throat, "she was yours. Silver is mine."

"This isn't a perfect little world we live in," I growled as I shifted my weight to pin Seb down, "things don't always work out the way we planned. But Silver is my responsibility now, and I never said anything about you two not being friends."

"I don't want to be her friend," Seb breathed out wrestling for dominance with me, "I want to wake up in bed next to her, I want to kiss her so much that she forgets where her lips end and mine begin.."

"Shut up," I muttered my hand shaking as I tried to dislodged Seb's own hands from around my throat. Mud coated my bare chest as we continued to wrestle on the forest floor. Once again I listened for Silver but heard nothing. My head thumped, I hoped she was alright. I hoped she was safe. I would never forgive myself if she got hurt.

"See?" Seb laughed manically, "you cant stand the thought of that. Can you? And you said you would be content with being her friend. Don't lie to me brother. You cant stand the fact that she wants me and not you. Finally something I have that you don't, how does it feel to be second best?"

"I love her," I hissed as Seb squeezed my neck in between his hands. He let out a curse as I bit at his arm. My body shook uncontrollably.

"And your saying I don't?" Seb whispered almost too calm. Bringing my leg up I kicked out at Seb, he laughed as I missed. I had underestimated his love for Silver. I was going to have a fight on my hands. He just didn't understand how perfect she was for me, how right. We were made for each other, the imprint had proven that.

"No-" I gasped, "I just w-want her to be happy."

Seb's hand slackened on my neck a little as we both heard a soft whine in the distance. She sounded awful. Heartbroken. And we both knew we were the cause of her pain, her hurt.

"What if I'm what makes her happy?" Seb growled.

"If she tells me she loves you and wants to be with you then fine. But it wont be an easy fight brother," I breathed in deeply as he let go of my neck, "and I'm going to try my best to win her over. We both love her but only she can choose between us."

"I hope you look forwards to a lonely life," Seb kicked out weakly at my ribs before storming from the clearing. Glancing around I noticed the fresh blood mixed in with the mud and several trees only partially standing. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a tiny white wolf her brown eyes watching me carefully as if I was a threat. My heart ached as she turned and walked away. But I hadn't been lying, I was a fighter and Silver was my whole reason for living. I had to have her, I couldn't imagine live without her by my side.

May the best wolf win I thought as I let my eyes close.

_Thoughts?_


	10. Needing you

_Thank you for all your reviews, they continuously make me smile. Oh and a quick note this is not a double imprint story, it is only Samson that has imprinted on Silver. Here we go with another chapter. Enjoy.._

_**Ava's POV**_

Dee tapped her long fingers on the counter as her liquid gold eyes appraised my flushed cheeks. Shifting around on my chair I reread the same sentence for what seemed like the fiftieth time. Glancing up at the door I willed someone to walk through, I felt like I was facing a firing squad.

"So," Dee leant forwards and I had no choice but to look at her, "what did he look like?" Curling my hair around one of my fingers I let my eyes drop to the counter again to trace the familiar patterns with my eyes. Dee's probing questions were making me agitated. I wondered where Silver was, she hadn't called me like she normally did when she stayed out all night. I chewed on my bottom lip as my eyes strayed to the door of the shop yet again.

"Well," Dee nudged me almost sending me flying off the stool with her abnormal strength. I couldn't help but roll my eyes and smile slightly.

"I don't know," I mumbled, "he seemed taller? And he was dressed alright."

"Really you bump into Ian. _Ian_," Dee slammed her hand down on the counter, "and all you can say is that he looked taller? I want details. Is he hot? Does he still have a nice ass."

"Dee," I snapped, "I have a.." I trailed off as my face continued to burn under Dee's burning stare. I squirmed again.

"You have a what?" she whispered softly reaching for my hand, "you are completely single Ava. Its time you started living a little and noticing men again."

Snatching my hand away from hers I twisted my wedding ring around my finger with a frown. My heart slammed against my chest, a painful remember that Embry would not walk through the door at any moment and kiss me until my lips bruised.

"Sweetheart," I stood up turning away from Dee as she spoke, "its been over sixteen years. You have to let go. Its not healthy to still be so in love with a dead man."

I gasped quietly under my breath as if I had been hit by a bullet. Dee had never been so blunt before, she was always the one who had protected my feelings.

"Our love was magical," I barked, "irreplaceable. I cant just forget something like that. Embry was my soul mate. My one love." Walking around the side of the counter I ran my hands over the familiar shelves as I gritted my teeth together. I couldn't expect Dee to understand the emptiness in the pit of my stomach and how vanilla milkshakes made me sick even after sixteen years. Sometimes I felt like I was living a nightmare yet however hard I pinched myself I never seemed to wake up. Silver was the only constant in my life, the one thing that kept me chained to reality. Without her, without her resemblance to Embry I surely would have crumbled without him.

"I know," Dee followed silently behind me as I continued to walk around the familiar shop, "but Ian was always there, I know there's a part of you that loved him too. He was always so kind to you. Did you look to see if he had a wedding ring on?"

"Delilah," I whispered calmly, "please just drop it-"

"Ava," a breathless voice panted as they stumbled through the doorway. Swirling around my breath caught in my throat. I knew that look. The look of pity, Seth's face were drowning in it. I forgot our previous argument as Dee latched her hand in mine and squeezed it tightly. Something was wrong.

"What is it?" my voice cracked, "Seth what's wrong?"

He shuffled from foot to foot under Dee's icy gaze as he seemed to contemplate what to say. I narrowed my eyes.

"Seth bloody Clearwater," Dee snarled beside me, "you better tell us what the hell is going on our I will drain your useless body of all its blood."

"Silver," Seth gulped as he looked desperately at me, "its Silver. She's a wolf and Paul cant get her to change back. None of us can." Dee caught me as I stumbled backwards my hand pressed against my mouth. Not my baby girl. Not my precious girl, the curse couldn't have gotten to her too. Pressing my hand even harder against my mouth I muffled a scream. Seth flinched.

"Seb," Delilah blurted beside me, "what about Seb? Cant he talk her round?" Seth looked uncomfortable as he reached to scratch the back of his neck. My head spun as images of Embry's still wolf form engulfed my mind. Silver couldn't fight vampires. She couldn't. If I lost her my whole world would fall apart, she was the reason for my existence.

"Well," Seth coughed, "Samson imprinted on her. Seb's trashing the garage as we speak."

"Oh shit," Dee cursed beside me as I hit my hip off the counter. Everything seemed to spin around me.

"H-has she I-imprinted on him too?" I whispered my whole body numb at the thought of Silver running through the forest as a wolf. Briefly I wondered what colour of fur she would have.

"She hasn't changed back yet," the dark circles were visible under Seth's eyes as he spoke, "but Sam thinks it unlikely- Leah has never imprinted and he has a theory that girl wolfs don't. But I guess we'll have to wait and see."

"Poor Silver," Dee muttered under her breath, "my poor, poor Silver."

"I should have noticed!" I clenched my hands into fists letting my nails dig into my skin. I had known the signs. Her agitation when she was nervous, the way her body shook when she was over emotional. Thinking back I remembered the dent in the wall where she had fallen and the hand shaped mark on the handle of the drawers in the kitchen. And her abnormal body temperature.

"I should have noticed," I repeated fiercely. I had failed my daughter.

"We need your help," Seth muttered, "one of you need to talk to her. To get her to see sense."

"I c-cant," I stuttered my mind flashing once again to Embry's motionless wolf form lying on the forest floor.

"I will," Dee's voice was strong. Sometimes I thought she acted more like Silver's mother than I did and I had known for years that my daughter and her shared a special bond, a bond that not even I could understand.

"But you're a vampire," Seth blurted seemingly without thinking, "her wolf instincts will be telling her to attack you."

"Silver will not attack me," Dee 's voice sounded calm but I could hear the undercurrent of nerves in her voice. Sinking to the ground I held my head in my hands praying desperately that my little girl would be alright.

_Thoughts?_

_The next chapter will be back to Silver's POV._


	11. Remembering you

_I know, I know. It has been way too long and for that I am very sorry, exams have taken over my life. But here I am with an update. So please enjoy. Thank you for all of your reviews, they are what keep me going. _

_Just a quick reminder : Silver is Ava's daughter. Madison is Jared and Kim's daughter. Seb, Samson and Sarah are Sam and Emily's children. _

Dee's scent seemed to cover every surface of the forest. My nose burned and I couldn't tell which tracks were fresh and which were old. Some wolf I was going to be. I wondered if someone had told my Mum. Vividly in my mind I could picture the way her face would crumble like it had done so many times in the past and how she would squeeze her eyes shut desperately in an attempt to stop tears from leaking out. It never worked.

I couldn't hear Paul in my head any longer. Or anyone else for that matter. But someone must have been in their wolf form somewhere. What if there was a leech…I mean a vampire in the area? I had no idea how to cope with that. They would most likely crush my windpipe before I even had time to react. I wasn't cut out for the whole wolf thing, it was the one thing I had hoped I would never have to endure. But naturally fate went and through me another curve ball. Just another one in my messed up life.

Over and over I kept seeing Samson's face as he imprinted on me. His jaw slackened slightly in wonder and his dark green eyes glistened as if I was the person he had been waiting for his whole life. It unsettled me. How the hell was I supposed to ever resist him, to ignored him when he looked at me like that? It was Seb I wanted. Seb that needed me. Or so I had always thought. But Seb would never look at me like that, would he?

My mind flashed back to the last dregs of the fight that I had witnessed. Samson's muscled body lying on the forest floor covered with blood as Seb walked away, the winner. But instead of pursuing him Samson had sat unmoving as his green eyes flickered over my white fur for any sign of damage and unexpectedly my heart had squeezed in my chest. Stupid magical chord. Uncle Sam had always said that an imprint just pointed you in the right direction of the person who you would have eventually fallen in love with anyway. I decided that was a trolley load of crap. I would never fall in love with Samson. He was like the over protective brother you just couldn't get rid of when your date turned up on the doorstep but he wasn't someone who you held hands with or kissed on the beach. Unless you were Madison of course.

Oh crap. Madison.

She was going to hate me. She would never understand. Her whole life she had been in my shadow, waiting desperately for the day Samson turned into a wolf and she was finally his. She had been so certain. So sure. That she would be his imprint. Why did fate keep hurting all the people I loved? I thought about only a few days previously when Madison had lay on my bed her coppery hair splayed wildly around her as she had imagined all the things she would do if Samson imprinted on anyone other than her. And now I was to be her main target. I swear life hated me.

Laying down on the mud I made a whimpering sound as my fur got all wet. Just great. I wondered if that meant when I eventually changed back- if I ever changed back- that I would have clumps of mud in my real hair. That was going to be even worse to get out than paint. Briefly my mind skirted over what the pack had told me about switching forms, I tried to remember any snippet of information that I could. I had to think about something or someone that made me happy, that would be what changed me back. Something happy. Easier said than done in my predicament.

"Silver?"

All the hairs on my back stood up as the burning sensation I had smelled earlier crawled up nose, fiercer and more awful than before. Instinctively I arched my back and bared my teeth as if preparing to fight. To freeking fight? I didn't know the first thing about fighting. I tried to remember what the instructor had said the few times Madison had dragged me to self defence class…

Stand on your toes. I looked down at my four paws with distate. Did they count?

And then try and get around the back of your attacker. I glanced from right to left. How was I supposed to know what direction they were coming in? Wincing slightly I raised my nose up into the air and inhaled in both directions. I stumbled backwards a few steps. Left definitely left.

Next step was to grab the attackers hands from behind or if possible spray them with pepper spray. Because I just happened to have pepper spray with me. I groaned aloud which came out sounding more like a howl. I made the sound again. Maybe the others would come rescue me. The asses, leaving me all alone, defenceless. Inwardly I hoped I was stronger than Paul, although it was seriously unlikely.

"Silver?" the voice called again. But I recognised it. The soft voice with the melodic lint that I had heard so often when growing up.

Aunt Dee?

My nose burned stronger than before as she jumped lightly down from a tree in front of me and brushed her clothes off as if annoyed that they had gotten dirt on them. Where the hell had she come from. I backed up as my wolf growled at her. Almost without thinking my brain was calculating how to get behind her and lock my incisors around her throat.

No. No! I tried to push the wolf's instincts back. It was my Aunt Dee, however bad she smelled it was still Dee. Although admit ably I could understand why the pack were always on edge when she was around if their brain were consistently yelling at them to attack her. Maybe there was an off switch? I sure as hell hoped so.

"Silver?" Dee stood her ground as if to show she wasn't afraid of me, "are you okay sweetheart?"

The simple question brought tears to my eyes, I wondered if it was even possible to cry in wolf form. Of course I wasn't okay. Dee, sensing this took a step towards me but I took another step back. I didn't want to hurt her. I knew she was a vampire but she still seemed so flighty and girly in her over expensive clothes and designer hair cut. It was stupid of me to assume that I would hurt her, I mean she could probably kill me before I even had the chance to blink but still I was suddenly afraid for her safety with me around.

"Stupid question," Dee muttered mostly to herself as she smoothed down her hair, "I heard about Samson? You dealing with that okay?"

Frustrated I shook my head from side to side wishing more than anything that I could speak to her, that I could throw myself into her arms and sob. Would I ever be able to that again? Or would the smell repulse me too much? I couldn't imagine staying away from my Aunt Dee- not being able to fight over Leonardo DiCaprio with her or watch horror movies that my Mum couldn't stand. She was one of my best friends as well as the best Aunt in the world.

"Your Mum is worried," Dee whispered almost as if she could read my mind. I flinched. Of course she was worried. I bet she had retreated into herself too, I pitied the person that would have had to stay behind and watch her. She was probably a wreck. Dee was the only one accustomed to handle my mother's breakdowns. Even I couldn't handle it most days.

"We should probably hurry up and get back to her actually. So hurry up and phase." I growled lowly at her. If only it were that easy.

My mind immediately flitted to Seb and our afternoons in the garage but that immediately caused an ache in my heart. Would I even be able to do that with him anymore? I remembered all the times that we had hidden out in his truck together, the first time we had ever gotten drunk together. All those memories that had once brought me happiness seemed to engulf me with guilt and longing. My relationship with Seb was probably never going to be the same again. I whimpered quietly to myself.

"I said something happy," Dee glared down at her perfectly manicured nails in annoyance, "not depressing." I took a menacing step towards her but she didn't even flinch, she merely rolled her eyes. I gritted my teeth together with frustration.

"What about your Mum? Think about her."

Instantly my mind was filled with images of my mother curled in front of the television her eyes constantly rimmed red. Images of her still lying curled in bed during the afternoon or sitting in the garden only half listening to what I was saying. She was a ghost most of the time. The only time she seemed to come alive was when Dee visited or she was in the bookshop.

Books! Of course.

An image slipped into my mind. It was simple really. I was around five or six at the time. I knew my Mum was sad, was different from everyone else's Mum. But that afternoon I had come home from school crying and my Mum had sat me on her knee- I couldn't ever remember her doing that before or after that first time- and she read to me. I could remember her voice slipping easily into the role of the characters in the book and the way she had smiled when I had clapped my hands with excitement. I didn't realise my body was shifting form until it was too late.

My bones seemed to groan with pain as they contracted then relaxed. I could feel my body hunching over as a sharp pain ran up the length of my spine. The surrounding forest seemed to dull a little but it was still sharper as it had been when I was normal. When I was human. My body sagged to the ground as I completed the change and a red flush crept up the side of my neck as I realised I was completely naked. I wondered if it would hurt that much all of the time. I hoped not.

"Here, put these on," Dee chucked clothes at me before she turned around to give me some privacy humming slightly under her breath. Scowling I slipped on the expensive summer dress and ignored the ballet flats she had brought instead enjoying the sensation of the mud as my feet sunk into it and the sharp sting of the twigs underfoot.

"Dee," I whispered when I was changed. Without giving me a moment to breath she ran towards me and captured me in a tight hug. I stiffened instantly as her smell overwhelmed me. My body started to react by having slight spasms, The shaking unnerved me.

"Oh," Dee took an apologetic step backwards her gold eyes shining, "I probably stink to you. Right?"

"More than you can even begin to imagine," I murmured. Tilting my head up I caught spits of rain on my tongue enjoying the sensation of being human. I had never thought of it as something to be valued before but it truly was. I wished desperately to never have to change into an oversized wolf again, but deep down I knew that was never going to be possible.

"Oh I'm sure I can," she winked, "_dog_."

"Aunt Dee," I whispered brokenly, "everything is so messed up. I- I-"

"Darling. I didn't mean to upset you," she started to walk towards me and then stopped herself. I couldn't even hug my own Aunt anymore. My best friend probably hated me and my Mum would probably never be able to look me in the eyes without me reminding her of what she has already lost. My heart squeezed painfully tight in my chest.

"Come on," Aunt Dee cautiously pulled on my hand, "lets get you home for a warm soak in the bath."

Nothing was ever going to be the same again I realised as I followed Dee through the undergrowth, the rabbits scurried away from me just as they would when I was in my wolf form. I didn't blame them for being scared of me. Hell, I was scared of me.

_Thoughts? _


	12. Joining You

_Thanks you all so much for your reviews, they are what keep me writing. Here is a quick chapter to keep you going. Just a quick reminder: __Sarah, Samson and Seb are Sam and Emily's children. Silver is Ava's daughter. And Madison is Kim and Jared's daughter. _

**Madison's POV**

Stupid mud. Stupid rain. Stupid freeking La Push. Groaning I ran a hand through my tangled hair as I searched for my compact mirror in my bag, The world hated me. Or more precisely my father did. How the hell did he expect me to get around without my beloved truck? Did he really want me to stumble off a cliff to my death? Sometimes I wondered about that crazy man. Ever since I had grown boobs he has had it out for me. And I hated when Mum sided with him, all he had to do was put on that pouting face. Gah. Stupid, mushy parents.

Breath in. Breath out. Wiping my sweaty palms on my jeans I stared at the familiar, scratched door in front of me which I had barged through countless amounts of times in my life. Was I even allowed to do that anymore? Silver's words were on repeat in my head, 'You're perfect for each other. Why would he ever imprint on anyone else? You are going to make such a sweet couple.' Blah, blah, blah. Silver was too much of an optimist. Although I hadn't heard from her in at least twenty four hours. Maybe she was doubting my plan? I didn't blame her.

Sometimes I wondered if he did care for me as much as people portrayed him too. Sure, he followed me to parties with a disapproving frown on his face and held my hair back at two in the morning while I was sick. And fixed my car when I was actually allowed to drive it. And helped me with my homework. But he did that with everyone. Silver just failed to notice it because she was so captivated with Seb's every move. I swear if that guy didn't imprint on her all hell was going to break loose. He was like the beast to her beauty, although I myself had never seen her attraction towards him. Samson was the one I liked to drool over on a daily basis, not that I would ever reveal that to him. I did have a tiny bit of self preservation in my bones, I wasn't completely helpless contrary to my Father's opinion.

I wondered briefly how different he would look. He had always been 'bulky' as some people liked to call him but he was so much more than that. Ever since my hormones had kicked in I would fine myself examining the shape of his muscles under his tight shirts or stretching my neck to find myself getting lost in those emerald eyes of his. He was so dangerously beautiful and he had the whole silent thing going on which made him a bit of a mystery. I had always loved Samson. He was always there. My mum used to comment how we were the two loners when we were toddlers and we just seemed to grow together. It wasn't quite the fantasy I had always imagined but it sounded about right. Samson was my rock. He seemed to keep my grounded even when others couldn't.

Raising my hand to the door I knocked sharply three times. The wind blew the salty taste of the sea around me and a shiver ran down the length of my spine. Stupid nerves. I waited. And I waited. What the hell was taking them so long? All their trucks were loitered outside the house.

Hesitantly I turned the handle. The door opened with a high pitched squeak. The first thing I heard were voices. Raised voices. I flinched as I heard something smash. Emily was going to be pissed.

"He has no right. No fucking right." The voice was deeper and I could hear the anger absorbed within it but I knew instantly it was Seb. He could never make my heart stutter the way Samson did when he spoke. Keeping quiet I padded lightly towards the kitchen door filled with curiosity.

"Son," Sam's voice sounded weary, so unlike him that it made me pause in my tracks, "You know he can't control it. Fate-"

"Fuck fate," Seb cut him off his voice coming out as a growl. Peeking through the tiny gap in the door I had to hold back a gasp. He was so _big_. Bigger than Sam, almost as tall as Samson if that was even possible. But it was his eyes that scared me the most. His normally calm light green eyes that seemed to burning as he glared around the kitchen as if he was looking for something else to break. I had never seen Seb glare. Ever.

I wondered where Samson was. I was literally aching to see him. Despite their obvious differences the twins were never far apart, I had always been in awe of the bond they shared. They way they could finish each other's sentences despite their contrasting personalities and I had often seen them communicate with just their eyes. They often made me wish that I wasn't an only child.

"I know this is hard for you to accept," Sam was saying. My heart was racing in my chest. Was something wrong? Was Samson hurt? My head thumped loudly.

"_Accept_? I am not going to accept this. She is _mine_," his voice rose more which each word, "Mine. When has he ever held her when she cried? When has he ever made her laugh so much that she forgets the reason why? _Never_. That is my job. She is mine."

All the breath left me in a rush as my whole body froze. No. _No_.

"Silver is Samson's imprint. He is going to be very possessive of her. His emotions are going to be heightened. Give them time. She can still be your friend while they work things out."

"Friend. _Friend? _How can I be her friend when I see my so called brother doing all the stuff I was supposed to do. I love her Dad. I just wish I had realised it sooner." Samson roared but I could barely hear him. All I seemed to see was a blinding white light, everything else dulled around me. Distantly I was aware of trying to grab something to hold onto but I missed and fell. My cheek stung where I hit it off the floor.

"Madison?" Sam's voice sounded far away, almost as if I was under water, "Maddy?"

I just kept shaking my head. No. He couldn't of imprinted on her. She was the one who was so sure I was perfect for him. She was my best friend. My throat seemed to dry out and I realised I was sobbing. How the hell could I watch them hold hands? Laugh? Kiss? My stomach twisted at the thought. He was mine. She couldn't take that away from me. I wouldn't let her. Pain seemed to engulf my whole body.

"Maddy?"

"See," I could hear Seb's voice more clearly, "look what he's done to her. This is destroying everyone. _Everyone_."

"Seb. Shut up," Sam hissed. I had never heard him speak to any of his children like that before. Suddenly Sarah was in the doorway, as always Seth was beside her. My heart tightened again. Why was she so fucking oblivious of what was right in front of her face? Even as I shook on the floor I could see the way Seth glanced down at her, gauging her reaction, making sure she was alright. I cried out as another flash of pain embraced me. What the hell was happening to me?

"Madison?" I forgot how to breath as I saw him walk towards me. All the remaining air I had in my lungs seemed to escape me. I wrapped my arms tightly around my stomach. He was never going to be mine.

"Look what you've done," Seb's voice was barely above a whisper. Samson's eyes flashed as he knelt down beside me. I tried to flinch away from his touch but he held me close to his chest.

"I was going to tell you," his voice was soft, "I was supposed to tell you. I didn't mean for you to get hurt."

"But she did," Seb's voice was as cold as ice, "Cant you see you're hurting everyone? Madison. Silver. Mum. Dad. Ava. Just let it go. Love Maddy like you're supposed to."

"Something's not right," Samson was muttering as he smoothed my hair away from my face, "She's too warm. Shaking. I-" He got up to leave but I grabbed onto his hand. I couldn't let him go, I couldn't pass him willingly over to Silver. He was supposed to be my first kiss. He was supposed to be there for me. It was supposed to be us against the world. It was supposed to be him that stood with me at the alter. I blinked back tears as another shot of pain seemed to punch me in the stomach.

"Of course something's not right. You're breaking her heart you moron." Suddenly Seb knelt beside me too tilting my head so I looked into his eyes. He seemed to watch me expectantly for a moment before sighing loudly. I watched as he closed his eyes almost with defeat, all of his energy seeming to drain away from him in one instant.

"Something's not right," Samson was still muttering as he pulled away from me. I cried out as another stab of pain engulfed me, all of my muscles seem to cease up. Biting my lip I bit back a sob as my back arched. Everything seemed to stretch within me. It hurt so damned much.

"_Sarah_!" Seth shouted.

It was right about then everything became a blur. I watched as Seth pulled a chalk white Sarah forcefully behind him. Seb's eyes grew wide as he shuffled backwards and Samson looked like he was going to vomit.

"No," I whispered and then the final stab of pain seemed to swallow me whole. My scream of terror came out more like a growl. I flinched as I heard the sound of my clothes ripping in two. Then for a second everything was silent.

"Shit," Sam muttered. My head whipped up as Sarah's open book landed with a thud on the ground. Everyone's eyes were upon me.

I was a wolf. And I was severely pissed off. Not a good combination.

_Thoughts?_


	13. Seeing you

_I am so sorry it has been so long since my last update, it's ridiculous and I wouldn't blame you if you thought I was a terrible person but truthfully I had a lack of inspiration for a while there, and my life has just been so hectic. But I'm back and hopefully not going anywhere. Thank you so much for all the reviews, they are what give me the oomph to continue. Once again, sorry for the wait. Oh and just a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's child, Madison is Kim and Jared's. Samson, Seb and Sarah belong to Sam and Emily. Here we go.._

**Silver's POV**

Sitting on the back porch I stretched my long legs out in front of me with a wince of pain. I wasn't used to being tall, the awkwardness of my new, long limbs had caused me to fall countless times. So much for being a 'graceful' wolf. I winced.

A _wolf_.

I couldn't properly process that tiny little bit of information. Briefly, I wondered what would be expected of me. Often Sarah had complained softly about the many hours which Seth spent patrolling. I remembered clearly her chalk white face and the quiver in her hands if there were ever vampires in the area. Even being around Dee made Sarah nervous, as if she was her natural enemy. I swallowed the bile that had risen in my throat as I looked at the book lying shut beside me. I wasn't a natural fighter. In fact, I wasn't a fighter at all.

Tilting my head backwards I listened to the sobs coming from the kitchen. My Mum was haunted, it was if she couldn't bare to look at me. There were moments when I understood why. Only that morning as she had brushed by me to reach something she had flinched backwards almost with disgust. I reminded her too much of Dad. The warmth. The speed. The ability to turn into a beast at will. Everything she had tried to forget was suddenly glaring her in the face again. But I wished, just for a moment, that she would reassure me, that she would be the mother she was supposed to be. The mother I needed.

As well as the sobs, I could hear Dee's insistent whispers. She had been my saviour as always. Despite the awful stench that she seemed to give off constantly I had learned to hold my breath as she crushed me to her chest and told me everything would be alright, I wasn't sure if I completely believed her though. Nothing was ever going to be alright again. Everything was so messed up.

Without conscious thought my head snapped up as I heard a twig snap somewhere in the distance. My stupid wolf instincts always seemed to be in overdrive. Uncle Paul said it would at least take a week to gain any type of normalcy back into my life. I had scoffed, I doubt there was anything normal about a teenage wolf, especially a girl one. The amount of food I wanted to eat was ridiculous, thinking about it made me sick but when it was put down in front of me, I had no trouble stuffing my face. It was disgusting. I was disgusting.

And everything seemed to break around me. Frowning, I remembered the way my door handle had broken off almost easily the night before as I had held it tightly within my grasp. Then there was my clothes. Once again according to Uncle Paul, he was impressed by ability to not 'instantly phase due to anger', basically the polar opposite of him. But the three times I had unintentionally phased- not counting my very first transformation- my clothes had ripped into countless, worthless pieces. Dee was delighted and was instantly on the phone to Alice conjuring up new outfit ideas. Personally, I just wanted the time to mourn the loss of my scuffed converse which held so many memories within their ripped soles.

I narrowed my eyes slightly as I heard another twig snap much closer to home followed by a slight whining sound. Awkwardly I got to my feet as I glanced around my back garden.

"Who's there?" I coughed, not used to the low menacing tone my voice could put on, "Seth, I swear to God if that's you checking on me again I will rip your neck off." He had appeared the first night after my long soak in the bath tub. The tense set to his shoulders and the twitch in his hands told me he wasn't completely comfortable around me and had been sent by Sarah to see how I was doing. After I had politely told him to 'fuck off and leave me along' he had left only to return routinely due to Sarah's request. I sighed. I didn't need to be babied, I just needed to travel back in time and never, ever become a wolf.

But then again what if it was someone else. I seemed to have vampire on the brain ever since it had truly sunk in that I was a giant, mythical creature. Uncle Paul had told me my lessons were 'imminent', whatever that meant in Paul language. Probably never. Truthfully I was scared what the so called 'lessons' were going to involve. Did I really have the guts to dig my horrifically sharp teeth into some unsuspecting vampire's neck? I swallowed loudly. Probably not.

"Seriously," I muttered as I heard another high pitched whine, "If this is some sort of wolfy initiation I don't know about, you have chose the wrong time. Stop pissing me off or I'll-"

I didn't have time to finish my death threat as a tiny black blur hurtled out of the trees towards me. All the breath left my lungs in a gasp as it pushed me backwards onto the ground. What the hell? Panicked, I willingly brought on the transformation for the first time. I inhaled sharply as my back arched. Pushing upwards I felt my limbs extend unnaturally as I pushed the other wolf off of me and phased in mid air. A threatening growl left my throat almost naturally. What surprised me was the threatening growl I heard in response.

Snarling, I circled the other wolf. My mind sorted through the different members of the pack in my head as I tried to fight off my opponent's clumsy advances. The wolf was completely black and too tiny for the La Push pack. Briefly I wondered if it was a real wolf but I dismissed that thought completely. I could see the hurt in it's eyes, the calculating glance at the narrow space between us. My head thumped loudly as I tried to reach my mind towards the strange wolf. From inside I heard a strangled sound leave my Mum's throat. Dee was beside me in an instant, her fangs glinting in the sunlight as she stared down the other wolf.

Images assaulted me. Countless images, mostly of Samson. One where he still had his hair long, his eyes resting on a figure in the distance. One where he sat at the kitchen table, his fists clenched as he glared at the open kitchen door. A smiling Samson. An angry Samson. A laughing Samson. I felt dizzy, my heart pounding fast in my chest. No. _No_. It couldn't be. It wasn't possible.

One final image knocked the breath out of me. It was me. I lay on a patch of grass with a wine bottle in my outstretched hand, rain fell around me yet I didn't seem to care. Mascara ran down my face mingled in with the useless tears. Only one person had ever seen me in that state. Only one person had helped me home that night as I had sobbed consistently.

Madison?

Shit.

_I hate you. _

Distracted, I didn't have the time to act as Madison lunged at me. I let out a howl of pain as her teeth sunk into my side. Dee circled us, her stance tense as she looked searchingly into the trees, her eyes narrowed. Tilting my head towards her I tried to use my eyes to tell her not to intervene. I had to fix it myself. I had to. I didn't know if I could bare it if Madison hated me, she had been the only one keeping me going, the only one I ever really had besides Samson. I growled as she sunk her teeth deeper into my side.

_I hate you. _

Her thoughts seemed to consume my head, drown out every good memory we had ever shared. I felt like i was being stabbed in the heart, repeatedly.

Swiping upwards I dragged my claws down the length of her face as my wolf backed away, keeping distance. We met in mid air as she pounced towards me again, I clenched my teeth around her leg. My heart seemed to snap as she let out a howl of pain. I didn't want to hurt her. I really didn't.

"Silver?" A deep voice sounded. My body seemed to sag in relief at the sound. Madison flinched but did not let up her attack, her jaws continuing to snap at me. I didn't know how long I was going to be able to fend her off. I cursed in my head as she clawed at the area around my left eye. Her sharp claws stung like hell.

"Silver?" Another familiar voice sounded. Madison stiffened. Turning I made out the blurry shape of Samson as he phased in mid air.

I cried out as Madison pushed her whole weight on top of me. She swiped at my face and missed but it wasn't the physical pain which wounded me the most. The hatred that poured from her every thought, the betrayal that she felt left me paralysed. How did everything get so messed up? A sound didn't pass my lips as Seb also phased and helped Samson wrench Madison from on top of me. Our eyes locked for just a second before he looked away.

Water gathered at the edge of Madison's eyes. Maybe wolfs could cry after all. I lay limp on the ground while Madison turned her attention to clawing uselessly at Samson. Seb stood to the side, his eyes stony as he glared into the woods. Madison nipped at Samson once more turning and fleeing into the trees.

I had lost all of my most cherished friends in a matter of days. I should have wanted to cry and tear something apart, instead I felt strangely numb. Not even Samson's burning gaze could crack the wall that I had built to keep everyone out. I just wanted to be alone, I didn't want anyone to hear my thoughts.

For a stupid second I wished my Dad was there. I wished he was there to hug me and show me how to be a proper wolf, a good wolf, like he had been. How to love people without getting hurt. I needed him more than ever.

_Thoughts?_


	14. Leaning on you

_As always thank you so much for the reviews, you are all great. Here's a little filler chapter, don't worry there is plenty more action on the way. Enjoy. _

"Sarah. Stop it."

Ignoring me she dabbed repeatedly at my face before turning around to rummage in the first aid kit. Her green eyes were shining as though she was going to burst into tears at any minute. I couldn't handle tears, especially not from Sarah. My whole body felt numb, not even the antiseptic that Sarah was carefully applying to my cuts made me flinch. Everything was so fucked up, for one minute I just wanted to feel the pain. I wanted to experience the pain that I had inflicted on others. I was a terrible, terrible person.

"Sarah," I grabbed her hand in mid air as she turned around, "_Please_ stop it." She looked so small as she lowered her eyes to the ground. Behind the door I could hear Seth pacing up and down the corridor as if he couldn't trust me to be around his 'beloved imprint.' I could never hurt her, but then again I never thought I would have been able to hurt Madison either.

"I-I just want to do s-something," Sarah dropped her hand limply to her side as I let it go, "I feel so useless. Everyone else is looking for Maddy and I-I.."

"You thought you'd take pity on me?" I smiled weakly, "You know there's no point. Within a couple of hours all my cuts will have faded to almost nothing."

"That's not the point," her voice was unusually fierce as she turned to glare at me. "Everything is falling apart. Seb and Samson aren't talking," I flinched, "Maddy is heartbroken. Seth wont leave me alone for a second and y-you seem so broken." My heart squeezed tightly in my chest.

For a moment I wished Sarah had grown up with a normal family, with normal people. She was so smart and funny and brilliant, but in the Uley household she seemed to be constantly overshadowed by the drama. Every time I glanced over my shoulder Sarah was the one who seemed to be carrying all the weight on her shoulders. She always had to be so strong, I admired the way she seemed to keep it together. But the holes in her armour were beginning to show. I didn't want her to end up as damaged as me.

"I'm not broken," I murmured bitterly, "Not everything has to be fixed Sarah. Life sucks or haven't you figured that out by now?"

"You don't think I know life sucks?" she hissed as she sat down on the closed toilet lid, "My two best friends just attacked each other. How the hell do you think I feel? Just because I'm not a wolf doesn't mean I don't feel. Just because I'm a wolf doesn't mean I can't help you or Mads or Seb and Samson. I just wish you would all stop acting like stupid children and get on with it."

"I know, I know," I held my head in my hands as I heard a door slam elsewhere in the house, "I just don't know what I'm doing anymore. Everything is just wrong-" My voice cracked as I hastily wiped useless tears away from my eyes. Tears were a sign of weakness. I thought of my Mum's haunted expression, her reluctance even to be in the same room as me. Would she ever be able to love me again?

"Hey," Sarah's voice was softer as she jumped to her feet and hugged me fiercely despite her tiny frame, "Everything will work out, it always does."

"Where do you get all your faith?" I wondered aloud as I tried carefully not to crush Sarah to me, Seth would have definitely given me hell for that. I stiffened as a familiar muddy scent reached my nose. Sarah let out a little squeak of fear as someone banged harshly on the door.

"Pack meeting," Paul sounded older than I had ever heard him, "_Now_."

Glancing quickly in the mirror I scrunched up my nose in horror. Long, mangled cuts covered my face and arms, leaves were tangled in with my mass of hair and my eyes looked almost wild, as if looking for my next target. I didn't look like me. Stranding straight I reached reluctantly for the handle not wanting to face reality, my palms were sweaty.

"Everything you need is in there," I tried unsuccessfully to smile as Sarah pressed her hand to my heart, "Remember there are people that love you." I wasn't so sure about that matter of fact statement. My enemies were growing by the hour.

The hallway was unusually silent as I forced myself to open the door, only the ominous sound of my bare feet hitting off the floor could be heard. Holding my breath I paused outside the kitchen. I wasn't sure if I was ready to face what was inside. I wasn't sure I was ready to face the people I loved so much that it physically ached.

"Just make it quick. The longer you leave it, the harder it will be." Looking over my shoulder I watched as Sarah made her way quietly towards the stairs a book tucked safely under her arm. I wished it was that easy for me to escape from reality.

"Aren't you coming in?" More than anything I wanted her beside me. During our friendship I had tried my hardest to keep her from harm, to shade her from the harsh realities of the outside world. But just once I wanted her to hold _my_ hand, to keep reassuring me.

"It's pack business," she shrugged her shoulders but I could see the envy in her eyes. I would have swapped places with her in a heartbeat.

"_Silver_!" Paul's voice roared from inside the kitchen. Wiping my sweaty palms on the shorts I had borrowed from Emily I pushed the door open before I ran away like a coward. The tense atmosphere knocked the breath out of me, the air was almost suffocating.

Seth stood in front of the doorway, his mouth was smiling weakly but his eyes were frowning. I watched as he tilted his head up towards the ceiling most likely listening to Sarah as she curled up on the corner seat in her cosy room and waited for him. Her whole life was spent waiting for him. I fought the urge to sigh. Colin and Brady sat at the scratched, kitchen table, their actions unusually sluggish and sad as though they were disappointed in us, in me.

At last my eyes found Maddy. She sat on the tiled floor against one of the cupboards. Mud smeared her face mixing in with the dried blood and her expression seemed almost dead, as if she had detached herself from everything around her. As if she was numb, like me. My whole being ached to console her like Sarah had done to me but knowing I was the cause of her problems made everything so much harder. Biting down on my bottom lip I tried to ignore the tight feeling in my chest. I tried to ignore the slight tremors of Madison's body.

Samson's eyes followed me as I slotted myself into a free corner of the room, they ran down the length of my body as if calculating my every scratch, my every bruise, I felt as if I was on fire. His fists were clenched at his sides as if _he_ ached to touch me but knew I would never allow it. For the briefest of seconds I thought about hiding behind him, letting him fight my battles, I knew he would have done it without even blinking.

But then there was the other obstacle; the biggest of them all. Seb. His smile was the only genuine one in the room, the only familiar thing I had seen in what seemed like years. Everyone watched as he crossed the room to grab my hand in his, almost predatorily. A strange sensation wormed it's way into my stomach. I did not like being treated like an object but the familiarity of him made me let it go. I needed something, anything to hold on to even if it meant hurting others in the process.

"I don't care if you all hate each other," Paul's voice was quiet as he spoke, almost as if he could hear my thoughts, "Our duty is to protect La Push. Our duty is to kill those filthy blood suckers. I don't care what goes on outside this room but when you are on patrol, you are all a team, you are all responsible for each others lives." Sam nodded consistently from his own spot at the table, as if eager to speak but no longer able.

"I never knew you were a preacher Paul," Brady's joke fell flat. Colin was the only one that managed a half smile, everyone else was deadly silent. I could feel Samson's glare on Seb and I's interlocked hands. Madison seemed to rock back and forth with her eyes closed. Everyone was going crazy.

"Silver, Brady and Seth you're a patrol team just now. Madison you're with Colin and Seb. Samson you're with me."

"Maybe Silver should be with me…" Madison's eyes snapped to mine as Samson spoke, as if she had just realised I was in the room. Narrowing her darkened eyes she seemed to be restraining herself from launching herself across the room towards me. The fury just seemed to pour off her in waves.

"No. _No_!" I interrupted shrilly, "What Paul said is fine."

"Good choice," Seb's warm breath on my ear sent a shiver down my spine. I could almost feel the hurt radiating from Samson, his whole posture seemed to slump with defeat. The gesture effected me more than it should have, I restrained myself from apologizing and crying into his chest. Stupid imprint. It wasn't Samson I wanted, it had never been Samson.

I just had to remember that.

As my eyes found Samson's blazing ones I found it hard to remember why I had consistently pushed him out of my life. But for the sake of Madison I avoided his gaze. Instead, I squeezed Seb's hand in mine. Everything had to go back to the way it used to be, the way it was supposed to be.

_Thoughts? _


	15. Looking at you

_As always, thank you so much for the reviews, it blows my mind that many of you return chapter after chapter to keep reading. Thank you again. Here we go with another chapter, thought I would take a bit of a risk and do a chapter from Sarah's POV, let me know what you think. Just a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's child, Madison is Kim and Jared's. Samson, Seb and Sarah belong to Sam and Emily._

**Sarah's POV**

Holding my breath I attempted to read the same line for what seemed like the fiftieth time. My Mum's out of tune humming filled the tense silence, her constant cheeriness made me want to hug her and scream at her simultaneously. Seth's arm was slung casually around the back of my chair, I wished he would drape it across my shoulders and pull me into his side. The warmth seemed to radiate off of him almost teasingly. It was obvious that I was the only one who ever felt the cold in those days.

Glancing across the table I watched as Silver picked at the mountain of food on her plate as if she couldn't bare to eat anymore. Her shoulders were slumped as if trying to regain the tiny frame she had owned before her transformation. With a sigh she twisted a strand of hair around her finger as she gazed out of the window. Briefly I wondered if she realised how close she sat to Samson, how her seat was almost touching his.

Over the week I had watched the secret glances, Silver's guilt ridden frowns. It was only when Seb and Madison were on patrol that you could really spot the differences, the tiny gestures. Giving up I closed over my book as I watched Samson catalogue the fresh purple bruise that had appeared at the top of Silver's arm, she had thrown herself into the wolf 'training'. He moved his hand as if to touch it before he flinched backwards in remembrance. Silver's eyes stayed trained on the window but I watched as her left hand curled into a fist. They were falling for each other and they didn't even realise it.

"So," my Mum's voice seemed too loud and enthusiastic as she spoke, "we should really think about what you want to do for your birthday Samson."

Silver pushed away her plate of half eaten food as Samson's eyes flashed black. My heart stilled in my chest. Their birthday. It had always marked the middle of the summer, the beginning of _our_ year. I thought of their countless parties. The vibrant orange flames dancing well into the night, Silver's high pitched squeals as Seb threw her up onto his back. Samson's polite dances with Madison. My Mum's red, grinning face. An unpleasant sensation wormed its way into my stomach. Would that ever be possible again?

"I don't want a party," Samson's voice was final as he glanced at Silver's quivering frame out of the corner of his eye in concern. Every time Seb was mentioned she seemed to withdraw into herself, build a wall between herself and the rest of the world. Guilt seemed to swallow her whole. Seth's hand found mine underneath the table. I squeezed it in thanks. He was always there for me, despite everything.

"You'll be eighteen," my Mum's voice seemed to crack slightly as she turned and forcefully opened the refrigerator, "You _will_ be having a party with Seb. As always."

My throat constricted as I glared down at the familiar patterns on the kitchen table. Seb and Samson barely stayed in the same room as each other never mind exchanged pleasantries. Forcing back a sob I clenched Seth's hand more tightly in mine as I remembered the nights where we would lounge in front of the television together, just the three of us. They would often go out without me, say I was 'too young' to understand, but I didn't mind. For as long as I'd lived there had been a special bond between them. As cliché as it sounds they really could finish each others sentences and convey something with just a single look. I missed that.

The new tension between them was almost unbearable, it hurt to breath when I witnessed the glares that passed between them. Deep down in my heart I knew that despite everything there had always been a sense of rivalry between them, of tense exchanges. I would never forget the look of longing in Samson's eyes as Seb and Silver had left the room together, laughing. I would never forget the stormy anger in Seb's eyes as he had found Samson carrying Silver up the stairs to my room. Silver had been entangled in their lives for as long as I'd known, but she had been blind to both sides of the story. The imprint had changed the game, had changed everything. It pained me to see the people I loved so much so unhappy, so clueless.

"We'll have a bonfire," my Mum was murmuring to herself, "I have the perfect present. Oh, I know, the girls can organize it." Silver seemed to struggle for air as she clawed at the edge of the table. Clearly in my mind I could see the set of paints and the new easel which she had hidden beneath her bed for months in preparation for Seb's birthday. I watched as her face turned panicked and she chanced a look at Samson. She needn't have worried, she knew him more than she gave herself credit for.

"I think it's a good idea," I whispered. Samson's eyes were narrowed and I tried not to flinch as Silver turned her shining eyes on me in betrayal. Seth let out a cough of surprise, I seemed to be surprising him a lot.

"You could bake the cake, Silver could sort out the music and Maddy can…" Seth's voice trailed off as the kitchen grew silent again. A single tear trailed down the length of Silver's cheek at the mention of Madison. I looked away.

All my life I had known my place. I was content with being normal, with not being special. My place was in the middle. I was the peace maker between Silver and Mads. We had always been friends. But, then again I had always had Seth as well. In a way I had been jealous of Madison and Silver's deep friendship, their constant worry for one another. Maddy had been the crazy one, the party person. Silver had been the quiet one, the only one who could ever make Maddy see sense. They had balanced each other out. Deep down I knew they had seen each others souls and never breathed a word of the challenges they both faced. It was heartbreaking to watch that friendship crumbled in front of my eyes, to fade away into nothing. Sometimes it felt like the past had never happened.

"Excuse me," Silver's words were barely audible as she pushed away from the table. My heart cracked yet again as I heard her stumble up the stairs to my room. She hadn't been home in days. Every time I went to my room either Silver or Madison would be sprawled across my bed in a deep sleep, I wondered if they realised how similar they were in nature even through their blind hatred. My room had been transformed into their safe haven, their cave to hide in when the other was on patrol. Luckily I was small enough to curl myself up beside them, they were always gone before I woke up though. And they made it their challenge to never cross paths.

"Thanks Mum," Samson's voice was low as he gazed helplessly up at the ceiling, "That was real great."

Out of the corner of my eyes I could see the tears well up in Mum's eyes, the way she bit down hard on her bottom lip in obvious pain. In that moment I hated Silver, I hated Samson. I hated the whole wolf pack for fucking up my whole entire life. I slid my hand out from Seth's as I opened my book again. Beside me I heard Seth sigh. Consistently I wondered why he bothered to put up with me.

I was a mess.

Letting myself get lost in my book I didn't even blink when Samson left to go on patrol and Madison fell asleep on the back porch. All communication seemed to have broken down. With Seth beside me I pretended not to hear Silver's wretched sobs from above me or my Mum's quiet ones from the nearby toilet.

"Everything is going to be alright."

Seth forgot I sometimes knew him better than he knew himself. Closing my eyes I wished desperately that I had imagined hearing the lie in his voice. I imagined everything was the way it had once been. Those days almost seemed like a fairytale. A false, faraway fairytale.

_Thoughts? _

_Next chapter will return to Silver's POV. _


	16. Missing you

_Hey y'all. I love getting reviews, thank you to all of you who continue to take time and write them, it helps me to keep writing. Here we are with another chapter. Back to Silver's POV. Enjoy…._

I awoke to the sound of laughter; breathless, over exaggerated laughter. The sound was so foreign in our house that I immediately sat forward, pulling the covers to my chest as I listened for confirmation. There they went again. Almost in a daze I reached for Seb's oversized sweater to pull over my head before walking without conscious thought towards the stairs.

It was only the third time I had slept at home in a month. My legs were too long and dangled uselessly over the end of my single bed, I felt like a giant in a dwarfs bed. But I had forgotten how comfortable it was, how easy it was to fall asleep surrounded by the familiar smells of my room and the sound of my Mum and Dee's hushed voices from down the stairs. I had missed it.

Throughout the month I had slept mostly in Sarah's bed, on the Uley's couch or in my wolf form on the muddy forest floor. But the tension had been getting to me. The silent looks from Samson were driving me insane, most days I had to restrain myself from throwing him into his arms and others the guilt hit me so hard that I found it hard to breath, found it hard to do much of anything apart from pretend to sleep. And then there was Seb, his constant his chatter, his forced happiness as we half heartedly threw paint at wall after wall after wall. He was tiring me out whether intentionally or not.

The party had become everyone's main focus, as if it would magically fix everything. Every time it was mentioned Samson would glance at me as if to check I wasn't going to slip into some never ending panic attack while Seb bugged me constantly about what I had bought him. Madison didn't contribute at all, her stony glances had become rare and far between, instead she seemed to never be around, that was what worried me most of all. I missed her too.

The laughter seemed to increase as I quietly placed my foot on the last step expecting to wake up from some bizarre dream at any moment. My Mum's quiet laughter was the most foreign to me; almost girly and shy. Chewing on my bottom lip I padded softly down the hallway remembering at the last minute to duck and miss the light shade with my head. Being tall was such a bitch in a house full of small people.

"No way. No fucking way," Dee's voice was louder than usual mingled in with her bubbly laughter, "She said that?"

"I was tired," my Mum's voice sounded unusually defensive as she let out another giggle, "Besides, the guy was annoying me."

"He definitely was. I don't think I've ever seen you that wound up." My mouth dropped open as I pushed open the kitchen door to the sound of a deep, manly voice.

Ian.

All three sets of eyes snapped to my slouched form in the doorway, the laughter cutting off abruptly. Ian's arm was slung leisurely around the back of my Mum's chair, his mouth was curled upwards into a smile and my Mum's face was unusually flushed from all the laughter.

"What kind of time do you call this?" Ian's attempt at more hilarity seemed to fall flat as my Mum's grin flopped down into her usual frown, "I know teenagers get up late," he continued, "but isn't five o'clock going a little overboard?"

My hands reflexively curled into fists at my sides as I forced my body not to shake in anger. He was way too close to my Mum. She seemed so fragile and breakable beside his large frame. She didn't need him. She had Dee. And me.

How dare he question me like he was an authority figure, like he had any kid of power in my life? What he didn't know was that I hadn't crawled through my bedroom window until seven in the morning after patrolling all night. I really didn't like him.

"Silver-" Dee began to get up and walk towards the fridge, her nose wrinkled in frustration.

"I'm not hungry," I murmured, even though my stomach protested otherwise, " What is _he_ doing here?"

My Mum's eyes were focused intently on the table as Ian turned to face her, I tried not to see their hands join underneath the table. How had I been so blind? How had I missed my Mum moving on? How dare he. How _dare_ he.

"I invited him," my Mum's voice was timid as if she was condemning herself to an eternity in hell. My nails bit hard into the palms of my hand. Could I really trust anyone? Dee had been lying to me, or 'failing to mention' what had been going on. My Mum had barely looked me in the eye in months yet she had a new man. I had the sudden urge to vomit.

"I-I need to go," I decided suddenly as I turned away from the scene before me, it hurt too much to look. Dee's hand was cold as she placed it on my arm, not looking I shrugged it off before heading for the door. My heart felt strangely heavy in my chest.

Without conscious thought I found myself at my Dad's grave. I wanted to lash out, to scrape away the curvy lettering on his headstone which made his death so much more real, more permanent. I thought of the picture in the Uley's lounge, his bright smile and enthusiasm seemed to jump out of the page. Life was so unfair. So cruel.

"Silver?"

Swirling around I let out a scream of frustration. My whole body shook. Samson stood before me, his eyes were wide open with concern and his hand was stretched out towards me as if to help in some way.

"Cant you all just leave me alone?" I screamed, standing up to push him away, "I don't want you here. I don't want you. Don't you get that?" A sob burst from my throat as I continued to lash out at Samson's bare chest. He didn't even feel warm to me as he once had, because I was damned freak of nature as well. I couldn't even be alone with my Dad, the one person I was supposed to be able to rely on during my life yet couldn't.

"Silver," his voice was barely a whisper, "You don't mean that. Come on let's get you home."

"I don't want to go home," I struggled against him as he stopped my weak attempts at hitting him, "I don't want to go home. And I do mean it. I _don't_ want you. I hate you."

"Stop it," his voice was raw as he crushed me to his chest, "Stop trying to hurt me. Stop trying to hurt yourself. Everything is going to be alright." Gathering all my strength I tried to push him away but he was too strong, too damn big.

"How is everything ever going to be alright?" I dug my nails into his chest as I yelled against the wind, "I have no friends. My Mum is dating again. I'm a freaking wolf and I feel guilty all the time. I don't want to feel guilty." I hiccupped. His hand felt soft against my hair, almost soothing as the last of my strength seemed to drain from me. I clung to Samson in desperation.

"It's alright to miss him," he whispered as I turned to glare at my Dad's grave again. I had always hated it. It was too ugly and boring, not like him at all.

"I didn't even know him though," a sob got caught in my throat, "How can I miss someone I have never even met?"

"He's your Dad. You've heard stories and you know what he would have been like. You know in your heart that he was a good man. It is alright to miss him," he repeated. I clung to him, clung to his words.

"I just don't want him to be replaced," I admitted, "I'm an awful person. I can see my Mum is happy but I hate the way Ian looks at her, the way he sits in our house like he belongs."

"You're not an awful person-" Samson began, tilting my head up to look into his dark, smouldering eyes. The depth of them caught me off guard.

"But I am," I stressed taking a step backwards to sit on the grass, "Being here with you is betraying Seb. Having paint therapy sessions in the garage hurts you. Looking at you for longer than I'm supposed to hurts Madison," I stumbled over my words, "And then all of that combined gets landed on Sarah and your Mum, everything is my fault," I took a deep breath, "I shouldn't be here with you."

He frowned as he reached out to grab my hand in his. His skin was so much softer than I had expected, his hand seemed to fit perfectly with mine. I swallowed a lump that was stuck in my throat. The sun shone down on both of us.

"You were always my friend, at least I think you were," his face was so open, so vulnerable, "I have always liked you. You have to have known that."

"I-I-" I couldn't think of any words to say. Was it possible I had been so blind?

"But you were never there. It was always Seb. Always," Samson's eyes darted away almost in pain as I spoke. My heart trembled as I watched his body begin to shake under the impact of my words. I really was a terrible, terrible person.

"Who carried you up the stairs after you sprained your ankle at our birthday party? Who held your hair back when you were sick the very first time you ever got drunk? Who drove to Seattle when you and Mads were stranded?" His eyes were blazing.

"I-"

"Who knows that you love strawberry milkshakes but can't take them home because it makes your Mum upset? Who knows that you sing in the shower and that your favourite disney film is the Beauty and Beast because you wish appearances didn't matter so much in the real world? Who broke Issac Mutons nose when he asked you to the school dance and then asked someone else the next day? Who watched you all the time, all the fucking time to make sure you didn't get hurt?"

His breathing was out of control as he took a step away from me. I watched as he gazed up towards the sky as if searching for answers. Shocked, I wiped the useless tears off my cheeks with the back of my hand.

"I didn't know," I sniffed.

"Seb knew. My Mum knew. Madison knew. Sarah knew." My heart seemed to crack a little with every word. I let out a shaky breath as he reached out to hold my face in his hands. I shivered.

"Seb couldn't have known-" I shook my head, unable to believe him. Samson forced me to look at him again.

"It doesn't matter. None of it matters," he sighed as his thumb made soothing circles on my cheeks, "Can we start over? Be friends, at least for a little while?"

"Friends," I agreed softly trying my hardest not to gaze at his lips so close to mine.

"So what's your favourite colour?" His abrupt question caught me off guard. I let out a strangled sound of laughter as he smiled down at me. I had forgotten how easy going Samson could be.

"Green I think like the colour of the trees in the sorest when it rains. Yours?"

"Green," he grinned.

My heart skipped a beat.

_Thoughts? _


	17. Envying you

_I know, it has been entirely too long, and I'm sorry. School has just been piling the work on of late and when I haven't been working my ass off, concerts and lazy nights in with my friends seem to have taken over. But, I am on holiday this week and I promise to update, update, update! Thank you so much for all of your reviews even though I've been away, it reminds me that I have people that want to keep reading and that spurs me on to keep writing. So, here we go with another chapter. Enjoy…_

**Sarah's POV**

Biting down hard on my bottom lip I sighed in frustration as I tried to reach behind me again. Stupid zip. It was strange to have my room to myself for once. Silver's few belongings were strewn across my bedroom floor and Maddy's fresh pine scent seemed to linger in the surrounding air. I paused as I heard the floorboard in the hallway creak. My saviour.

"Help me," I called out in desperation. Below me I could hear voices floating up from the garden and the soft tribal music that reminded me of my childhood. Closing my eyes I tried to savour the moment, the one moment of peace I had experienced in what felt like a lifetime. Soft footsteps padded into my room.

"It's my zip. It's stuck," I murmured with my eyes still closed. I winced as I heard something smash down the stairs. It amazed me how the wolfs continued to break so many plates despite their fast reflexes. I stiffened as I felt a warm breath on the back of my neck, the familiar smell overwhelming me in that moment. Staying silent I held my breath as the noise of my zip being pulled up burned my ears.

"You look beautiful."

Opening my eyes I looked at us both in the mirror. Seth looked tired, the dark circles under his eyes making him seem so much older than he was. But it was his hands I noticed first, his hands which lay so gently on my shoulder, almost as if he was afraid to break me. I was tired of being so fucking breakable, of being excluded. I was strong and independent, I just wished the others would notice that.

"You obviously haven't seen Silver yet," I murmured as a red blush spread across my face. Glancing in the mirror I tried to find the 'beautiful' that Seth had described but all I could see was plain. I didn't have any of Maddy's fire or any of Silver's almost aloof unapproachable persona. My favourite dress fell to just above my knees, the floaty material almost seemed to drown me. White. Plain. Innocent. That was me, it always had been. And I was tired of it.

"I have seen Silver, but she's not a patch on you," his voice was gruffer than usual, sending shivers down the length of my spine. My breath caught as he pressed his lips carefully to the top of my head, the warmth of his hands seem to seep in my bloodstream leaving me almost dizzy. My mind was unusually blank as he turned me around to face him, my eyes darted sub consciously to his lips. Was that what I really wanted? My heartbeat went haywire as he took another step towards me, my arms shook as I wound them around his neck. The laughter from below seemed to fill me with a weightless sensation. It was perfect moment.

"Sarah!"

I snapped back to reality, my arms immediately detangling from around Seth's neck. Taking a step backwards I tried not to notice the way his face seemed to sag, the way in which his shoulders slumped in defeat. Wiping my palms on my dress I catalogued the unusual wideness of my eyes in the mirror. It was not the time to delve into any feelings I had for Seth. It wasn't fair on either of us, I was an emotional wreck and he was exhausted. We were both delirious.

"Sarah," my mum called again, "Come and help Silver take the hotdogs out to the bonfire."

"I-I," I flung my arms in the direction of the door as a small smile appeared on Seth's face, "I need to go and…you know. Help." Ducking my head, I cursed inwardly at my stupid stammers. Seth let out a booming laugh as he slung his arm casually around my shoulder as if nothing had happened. Maybe nothing had happened. My heart seemed to deflate slightly and my gaze drifted longingly to the open book lying on my bed.

"Oh no you don't my crazy girl," Seth murmured as he dragged me from the room, "No reading for you tonight. At least try and look like you're enjoying yourself."

"It's going to be a disaster," I glanced up at him out of the corner of my eye as he paused at the top of the stairs. He looked so relaxed. So out of my league.

"It's going to be just fine. Silver and Madison have been warned to be on their best behaviour. Your brothers actually seem to be talking and no wolf would dare cross Em. Need I remind you this was your idea?"

"It was a stupid idea," pushing away his arm I started my clumsy descent down the stairs, "What does it matter if no one is really happy?"

"I'm happy," his voice was no more than an echo behind me as I stumbled into the kitchen wishing instantly that I had stayed in my room all night. Silver was staring blankly at the plate of hotdogs in front of her as she drummed her bitten fingernails repeatedly on the table. Her hair was tangled into a bun at the nape of her neck and the emerald green shirt she had on seemed to hug the few curves she had, making her seem more like the wolf she was, rather than the scared girl she used to be. Envy seemed to consume me.

"Are you alright?" I forced a cheery smile on my face as I nudged her out of her daydream. She pushed a loose strand of hair away from her face as she finally registered my presence. Glancing out of the kitchen window I watched as my Dad made Aunt Claire sit down on one of the deck chairs rather than help with the food. My smile grew more genuine.

"I'm fine," Silver shrugged, "Tonight is for Seb and Samson. I cant believe they're eighteen already. They seem so…" she trailed off as Madison strolled into the room, her high heels clicking almost ominously on the tiled floor.

"Old?" I finished for Silver as her eyes dropped to the floor. I tensed as I felt Seth's presence behind me, my own eyes were fixated on Maddy. The black dress she had on clung to her body and was entirely too short to be appropriate for a 'family' party. My eyes grew wider as they fell on her endless legs. She had always been tall but the transformation had been kind to her, she seemed so much more at home in her new body than Silver did. Briefly I wondered what Seth thought of her new look. I curled my hands into fists.

"See something you like?" Her voice was dripping with sarcasm as she reached for one of the unopened beers lying on the kitchen table.

"Y-you look nice," I said lamely as her smirk grew. Silver shuffled uncomfortably beside me. I winced as Seth placed his hand on my shoulder.

"I thought it was appropriate. Black to match my soul," she laughed darkly and my stomach twisted itself into a knot as she leant against the door frame and Seth joined in with her laughter. I tried not to smile in thanks as Silver rolled her eyes discreetly in my direction. Maddy always had been a little dramatic.

"Don't be stupid," my own laugh sounded wrong as I reached for the plate of burgers to take outside, "You look lovely."

"Thanks Sarah," her eyes flickered up and down my dress, "So do you, but then again you always look charming in that dress. I'd like to say Silver looked nice too but you know I thought even she was above wearing a shirt and shorts to her beloveds eighteenth birthday."

"Madison," I gasped in shock as Silver seemed to still beside me.

"Oh wait. Silly me. Which one are you going to end up with the end of the night? Seb? Samson? Or maybe you'll continue to trail both of them along." Her voice had a wicked edge to it that I had never heard before. I felt like I was seeing a stranger stand in front of me.

"You bitch!" Silver snarled, I took a cautious step backwards as she began to shake.

"Silver. Madison." Seth's voice was a warning as he pushed me behind him, "I know you have your issues but tonight is not the time nor the place to resolve them, and if Sarah gets hurt because of your fiery tempers, it will be me that you have to answer to."

Silver picked up two plates and pushed by Madison and into the garden. I watched as she paused and took a deep, shaky breath before walking purposely towards all the people gathered around the bonfire.

"What the hell was that?" I whispered furiously as I pushed by Seth. He looked down at me in bewilderment as I took another step towards Madison. She merely narrowed her eyes at me.

"Sarah darling, don't meddle in things you don't understand," I flinched at the patronizing edge to her voice.

"You're not the only one hurting you know." Seth grabbed onto my arm as I went to take another step forward. Outside I saw Brady and Colin glance towards the house. Damn wolf hearing.

"Oh, I'm not hurting. I was, but then I realised the war isn't over. In fact it has barely begun. All is fair in love and war sweet Sarah. Don't underestimate me."

Smiling brightly at me, she blew me an air kiss before turning on her heel and walking back into the garden. I felt the sudden urge to be sick. As the noise grew from outside, the kitchen seemed to spin around me. Seth's hand on my shoulder seemed to be the only steady thing in my life.

"Well tonight is certainly going to fun," Seth's voice was sour as he pulled me closer to him. His words caused the knot in my stomach to tighten.

_Thoughts? _


	18. Dancing with you

_I'm sorry, it has been entirely too long since my last update. This took me a while to dream up. I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you think. Just a quick reminder: Silver is Ava and Embry's child, Madison is Kim and Jared's. Samson, Seb and Sarah belong to Sam and Emily._

**Silver's POV**

Breathing deeply I tried to control myself as the tray of hotdogs rattled in my outstretched hands. I forced myself not to frown as Brady glanced over in my direction. I had to calm down. Things would certainly kick off if I transformed into a wolf in the middle of the party. Pushing away the sound of Madison's menacing voice I stumbled in the direction of the fire.

Samson's eyes were on me the whole time. It had almost become second nature to feel the fiery sensation claw at my body as he stared, all the damn time. Glancing down at myself I winced at the shorts and shirt I wore. Maddy had been right, I certainly wasn't dressed for the occasion. I let out a scream as Seb hooked his arm around my back and kissed me almost too firmly on the cheek.

"How is my favourite girl?" he smiled as he took the tray of hotdogs firmly from my hands although his grip on my waist did not loosen. Tilting my head to the side I watched the way Samson's eyes narrowed and he seemed to throw himself into the conversation he was having with Jared. I swallowed loudly. I could never do anything right.

"How's the birthday boy?" I murmured quietly instead of answering his question. I held my breath as Madison sauntered by, her legs looked seemingly endless in that tiny, little black dress. Taking a step away from Seb I hugged my arms protectively around my body as Madison flopped carelessly down beside Jared and Samson. Seb's eyes narrowed as I automatically ground my teeth together.

"I'm great," he muttered distractedly as he towed me towards the table. I tried not to cringe away from him as he placed the hotdogs on the table before pulling me down onto his lap. Before, I wouldn't have thought twice about such an action but all of a sudden it had a whole new meaning. Emily's smile was forcefully stretched as her eyes narrowed in on Seb's hand resting lightly on my waist. Sarah was frowning as she sat as far away from Madison as possible, her cheeks flushed as Seth smiled softly at her. She was blind to his love. It almost made me angry.

Samson's reaction was the worst of all. The slight quiver in his body, the frown that seemed permanently etched upon his face. Nothing was ever simple, not for me anyway. I tried to ignore the way Madison was leaning towards him casually resting her hand on his arm. The possessiveness that rose up within me scared me a little. I did not care if Madison flirted with Samson. I really didn't.

"You look really nice tonight."

Seb's voice was no more than background noise as I watched Maddy slide closer to Samson. Sarah was chewing on her bottom lip as she narrowed her eyes at me from across the fire. Seth smirked at me almost knowingly. I felt suffocated. For the first time in my life I longed to be in my wolf form running through the trees.

"Did you hear me?" Seb's warm breath tickled my ear. His forehead was creased in worry as she silently drunk in the sight of my flushed cheeks and tired eyes.

"You've been training too hard," he muttered as he reached up to tuck a strand of my hair behind my ear. I froze. Samson had said exactly the same words to be only a day before. I realised that I had begun to compare them both, almost as if I was picking out the best model. I felt sick.

"I'm fine," I snapped, "I wish everyone would just stop worrying about me." I ignored Madison's nearby scoff. Samson's concerned eyes were immediately on me again. The tribal music seemed to create a barrier between us. Of that I was thankful.

"It's my job to worry," he muttered almost as if he didn't understand the emotions battling it out within me. He was right though. He was my best friend, the one I always relied on. Even before my transformation he had worried. Constantly. I was instantly aware as he inched closer to me; his breath was warm on my face. My eyes flickered down to his lips but I didn't feel the same fiery sensation in my stomach that I had once felt at the thought of kissing Seb. My face didn't flush in the way it did when Samson glanced at me for too long. Damn imprint.

"Girls," Emily's voice was breathless as if she was terrified, "Why don't you get some food before the boys eat it all?"

It was a stupid comment to make. Maddy and I ate almost as much as the boys. Yet her comment seemed to make a dent in the tension between Seb and me. I fought against the sigh of relief wanting to break out as he leant back a little. I couldn't meet Samson's piercing eyes, afraid of what I might find in them. He awoke feelings within me that I would rather leave dormant.

"Go get food," Seb smiled at me. I felt awful. His smile was so full of hope and love. It made me sick to the stomach that I had been thinking about Samson as he had been about to kiss me.

My feet felt heavy as I walked over to the familiar table piled high with food. The sight made me feel nauseous. Sarah was standing glaring at the hotdogs.

"Have the hotdogs done something to offend you?" I whispered in her ear desperate to get involved in some light hearted conversation. Everything was too serious. I ignored Madison as she reached for a paper plate beside me. Her presence instantly put me on edge.

"It's just the same as always," Sarah murmured as she picked up a hotdog, "but it's not, is it? My Mum is trying so hard to keep everything the same. But we're all changing. Maybe she should deal with that. And maybe you should to?"

"Sarah," I murmured. Her eyes were too narrow, the set of her shoulders too firm. I missed the days when we laughed for hours together. I felt personally responsible for the hurt that had appeared in Sarah's face almost overnight.

"It's true though," she whispered. I couldn't even disagree with her. She was right.

As if she could hear her daughter's words Emily came up behind us, a camera in her outstretched hands. It was a tradition. There was a whole album of photos where the three of us stood together at the boy's birthday parties. I could remember only the previous year when Maddy had pressed cake in my face as the flash had went off and Sarah had been doubled over in laughter. So much had changed in a year. It was frightening. Almost unreal.

"Photo time," Emily grinned. Behind her Samson stood with his arms crossed, a glare painted upon his face as he exchanged a look with Seb.

I bit back a gasp of shock when Madison leisurely slung her arm around my shoulder. Sarah looked apprehensive as I reached out to curl my arm around her waist. Forcing a smile upon my face I tried to forget how familiar posing with Madison was. She was gripping my shoulders just a tad too tightly. She leant down to my level as the flash went off.

"You're a cold hearted bitch," she hissed. As soon as the photo was taken Madison edged away from me as if I was diseased. Her smirk sent chills down the length of my spine. I tried to remember how to breathe as Samson approached me. Looking desperately around the room I tried to find an escape route.

"Be nice," Sarah's breath was cold on my ear, "It's his birthday. And don't lie to yourself. You know you want to talk to him too."

She was right. Watching her walk carefully back to her seat beside Seth I wondered when she had gotten so grown up. Never would I have imagined that Sarah would have been the one to call me out on my bullshit. She had always been the voice of reason but she had never pushed me. The new Sarah made me cautious but brave in the same breath and I loved her for it.

"Hey," I kept my eyes on the ground as Samson approached me. His was low and almost melodic sounding. It caught me off guard.

"Happy Birthday," I murmured awkwardly my eyes still firmly on the ground. His bravery caught me off guard as he tilted my face up to look at him. I watched as his eyes drunk in the green of my shirt and the slight blush to my cheeks. He made me stupidly nervous. It was just Samson. Just Samson.

"Will you dance with me?" I could feel everyone's eyes on us. Dee wasn't even trying to hide her interest as she blatantly stared at me from her faithful position beside my Mum. Seb's eyes burned a hole in the back of my head. Sarah was smiling.

"I don't think that's the best idea in the world," I whispered. My breath caught in my throat as his hand brushed mine.

"It's my birthday." His voice was so whiny that it made me smile. Level headed Samson was moaning at me because I wouldn't dance. The thought was almost too strange for me to process. I shot a look of thanks at Sarah as she dragged Seth up to dance. Emily followed suit and swayed almost naturally in Sam's arms.

"Please?" Samson added almost as an afterthought. Trying to keep the smile off my face I stepped away from the food table and wound my arms around his neck. He was the perfect height. The music from my childhood played softly in the background as we swayed from side to side.

"I'm not a very good dancer," I muttered. Seemingly without a second thought he lifted me up until my feet were resting on top of his before he began to move.

"There," he said softly, "Now you don't have to think about your feet."

I hid my smile from him. He had always done that with me for as long as I could remember after the very first time we had danced together when we were five and fallen into the food table. There had been some angry wolfs that day. It amazed me how many memories I had with Samson despite my insistence that Seb was the only one that I had ever created memories with. It was refreshing.

"Thank you for my present," he whispered in my ear as he spun us around. I heard my Uncle Paul's booming laughter from nearby and I watched out of the corner of my eye as Claire hobbled into the house with Quil hot on her heels.

"But I didn't get you a present," I frowned as he pulled me closer.

"Yes you did," he insisted, "You're here, aren't you? And you're wearing my favourite colour." My blush deepened at his observation. Damn him. I let out an almost unfamiliar burst of laughter as his stomach grumbled breaking the almost perfect moment.

"Go eat," I insisted steeping off of his feet. He grabbed my hand as I went to walk away. The voices ceased around us as he pulled me to him and placed a soft kiss on my cheek. It was devastatingly sweet.

"Thank you for the best birthday ever," his voice was hoarse and I had to blink away tears as I looked up at him. My heart thumped too loudly in my chest. His hand seemed to fit perfectly with mine. Too perfectly.

"Fuck!" someone cursed. Turning around in shock I watched as Seb dropped a plate of food before storming into the house. I wrenched my hand away from Samson's, creating an almost ocean like distance between us. His smile drooped almost instantly. Madison was right; I was a cold hearted bitch.

"He's being selfish," Samson hissed. I didn't like the new edge to his voice. Turning away I walked slowly by a frowning Sarah and my emotional Mother to get to the house. My whole body was shaking.

I searched every room in the house until I finally realised where he would be.

There are moments in life where everything changes. To some it is the birth of their first child. To others it is a five dollar note being given to them out of pity. There are big moments like getting signed to a major record label or burying someone you love. But for me, it was simple moment, almost insignificant and childish in the face of the rest of the world but it wounded me all the same. It wounded me so terribly that it changed my vision of the world completely.

Now, to you, that may all have been a tad dramatic. But as I ducked into the garage in an attempt to find Seb my breath seemed to get stuck into my throat. Tubs of paint were kicked over onto their side creating an almost hypnotising display of colours mangled together on the floor. His brand new art set was scattered against the wall and paintings ripped in half. It was a disaster. Everything he had ever loved seemed to be ruined.

But selfishly I didn't notice any of that at first. In fact, my eyes seemed to skim over the mess in one single second before they rested the cause of the lead heart pressing painfully against my chest.

Seb. Madison. Seb and Madison together. It was hard to differentiate from where one began and ended. They were moulded together as if they had been made for each other. Their lips were frantic as if desperately trying to devour each other and their heavy breathing seemed to echo in the tiny space. Madison's dress had ridden up to expose yet more of her endlessly long legs. Seb's hands were grasping tightly at her waist as if he couldn't bear to let go. They were so wrapped up in each other that they didn't even notice me standing pathetically in the doorway.

I felt like I was going to vomit. Leaning on the paint splattered wall for support I tried to push away the change waiting to take over me. I didn't want the others to see me in such a state, to be able to read my inner most thoughts. All I had done was momentarily hold Samson's hand and let him kiss my cheek. That was all. A simple gesture that would never have bothered Seb when we hadn't been wolves. Everything had been so simple back then.

I had taken a step back. I had let my heart scream at me as I turned away from Samson's blinding grin. Everything I had done was to save Seb pain. Never in a thousand years would I ever intentionally hurt my best friend. For as long as I could remember he had been my everything, the one I could rely on. Or maybe Samson had been right. Maybe I had been so captivated by falsities that I failed to see the rest of the world shouting at me from the sidelines.

Stumbling backwards I turned and fell out of the room. My heart felt like it was going to burst. I remember the endless nights Madison had teased me about Seb and I's connection. I remembered the nights I had spent curled up in Seb's car as he had painted. They were the two people I had trusted the most in the world. Their kiss felt like a stab in the back. But more than that it felt like revenge. Maybe I deserved it. They certainly seemed to think I did.

The laughter from the garden sounded too loud, too effortless. I thought of Sam and Emily sitting side by side stealing strength from each other. I thought of my Mum's forced smile. Of Dee and Paul's constant arguing. Of Seth's constant adoring looks for Sarah. Making my way up to Sarah's room I slid down one of the walls, my arms locked tightly against my stomach. My sobs sounded raw and almost feral against the warm happiness floating up from down the stairs.

I knew I had no reason to be so devastatingly upset, so bitter. I had Samson. He was supposed to be mine. We were supposed to be the two halves of one whole. I couldn't even deny the strange swirling in the pit of my stomach that I experience when I was around him. Yet, to me, Seb had always been the steady one. The one I had falsely presumed would one day be mine even if I pretended otherwise to the outside world. But he had just confirmed how different we had truly become. The Seb I knew would never have maliciously hurt me. The Seb I knew would never have toyed with a fragile Madison. I was the cause of their pain. I was the cause of everybody's pain.

Pressing my lips firmly together I tried to put an end to the sobs but they continued to escape me. In that moment I wished I had a Dad to run to. I wished I had a Dad to smooth down my hair and tell me that everything would be fine. I wished I had a Dad to take me home and laugh with me until our stomachs aches. Life was cruel. He had been taken from me before I could even smile, before I could even tell him that I loved him.

Hiding my face in my knees I gripped my stomach tighter in my arms. My whole world seemed to be crashing around me. I didn't hear the door open or the creak of footsteps until someone slid down the wall beside me. Blinking the useless tears from my eyes I turned to look into the dark, concerned eyes gazing back at me. I could see my pain reflected in them. Somehow he had known that I had needed him. A single tear ran down the length of my face.

"I-I'm sorry," I hiccupped, "You don't have to see me like this."

"No," Samson's voice was solemn as he tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, "I am the one who should be sorry. Cry it out. I'll always be here."

His words echoed inside my head and something seemed to crash down within me. I felt suddenly exposed and vulnerable. I didn't resist as he pulled me closer to him. We were broken but at least we had each other.

_Thoughts?_


	19. Using You

_So…don't be mad. I'm so sorry that I haven't updated any of my stories in so long. My life has just been so hectic. For those of you still waiting on me to update, thank you so much. I will finish them all one day. I promise. _

_Quick reminder: Seb, Samson and Sarah are Emily and Sam's kids. _

_Madison is Kim and Jared's kid. And Silver belongs to Ava. _

_Samson has imprinted on Silver. And Seth and Sarah are imprints. _

_Enjoy…_

**Madison's POV**

What had I done? What the hell had I done?

Scrambling to my feet, I frantically pulled my dress over my head, avoiding the countless paint pots littered around the room. I had always hated the garage, there was always too much stuff lying around for me to fall over. Running a hand through my tangled hair I hoped that I hadn't gotten any paint in it. It seemed hilarious that after everything that had just occurred, all that I was worried about was my appearance. I was too vain for my own good.

I felt numb.

"Madison. I-" Seb's voice was hesitant and I flinched away from his touch as he tried to place a hand on my arm. I could still taste him on my lips, I could still feel his hands on my waist and in my hair. He was everywhere. I didn't feel like I belonged to myself any longer.

"Are you alright? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

I needed something strong to drink. Immediately. Either that or I was definitely going to throw up everywhere.

"I'm fine," I snapped forcing the stupid girly tears back that had suddenly decided to appear, "I'm a wolf Seb; not some breakable little girl." My new bitchy persona seemed to be the only thing left that I had to cling on to. If I let myself actually feel my emotions; feel the hurt, and the hate and the envy, I would surely crumble into a thousand tiny pieces. I wasn't being weak any longer. I was going to be the strong one, and I didn't care if anyone hated me in the process. Or that's what I continuously told myself.

"I didn't mean for it to go that far," he seemed to be talking to himself rather than me as he pulled on his shorts, "I was lonely, you were there and-"

I hated him in that moment. I hated him more than Silver, more than Samson. As always, he was thinking of me second. I had known when I found him in the garage that he was lonely. I had just longed to be looked at the way that Seth looked at Sarah. All I had wanted was to be held, to feel someone's lips on mine. It should have felt magical, special, but instead I just felt dirty and cheap.

"It was just sex," I lied.

The words seemed to echo loudly in the silence of the garage. Sex. My head thumped. Seb tried to reach for me again but I backed away. The sound of my parent's laughter and the soft lilt of the music from outside was calling me. I felt the need to transform into my wolf and run for hours. I had never felt that urge before. I needed to get far, far away. Perhaps I would never come back. It wasn't as if there was anything for me in La Push any longer.

Seb looked so lost, it was scaring me slightly. I tried not to wince as he closed his eyes. He was probably imagining himself in a different place, with Silver by his side. I curled my hands into fists. It just wasn't fair. Nobody ever wanted me. Even my own father looked down on me with disappointment; I could never do anything to please him so I had given up trying. If everyone wanted to be disappointed in me, I might as well provide them with reason to; that was my new mantra anyway.

"I-I'm going to go back to the party." I hated the way my voice stumbled over my words. Seb's eyes flashed open and he grabbed tightly onto my arm before I had time to react. I growled lowly at him as I began to shake. I was not his possession. I didn't belong to anyone but myself.

"You can't," he looked anywhere but at me as he spoke, "You smell like.."

"Like you," I realised as he trailed off. The moment I stepped into the garden, the wolves would be able to smell Seb's scent all over me; that was definitely something that I didn't want to explain. Everything was just so fucked up.

"I need to get out of here," I muttered, "I need to get out of here _now_."

I was panicking suddenly. Anyone could walk into the garage at any moment, people would be beginning to miss us, or more specifically they would be missing Seb. It was his party after all. I felt suffocated.

"Let's go a run?" He suggested softly, "Get your mind off things?"

That was possibly the worst idea he had ever had. I couldn't run with him, I couldn't listen while his mind replayed everything that had just occurred. I couldn't stand the thought of him over analysing every fine detail of my appearance and wishing I was someone else. I was strong, but even I wasn't that strong.

"We can't think of this ever again," I concentrated on a splat of red paint on the wall behind Seb's head as I spoke, "Do you understand?"

"I promise." I couldn't stop myself from melting into his open arms as he spoke. I clutched at his forearms as I continued to avoid his gaze. My tough resolve was crumbling as the true extent of what had happened seemed to hit me full force.

"Please don't stop talking to me because of this," I whispered, hating how fragile my voice sounded.

"Hey," he tilted my head up to look at him, "Us messed up wolves have to stick together. Okay?"

"Even after this?"

"Especially after this," he sighed. I hated that I now had to add Seb to the list of people that I had hurt. We had never been close, despite practically being brought up together. For as long as I could remember, I had always had my heart set on Samson. He was supposed to be mine. It should have been easy.

"Can we please go and get drunk somewhere? I think I need to forget about all of this for a while."

"I'll grab the vodka," Seb spoke without a second's hesitation, "Wait out the front for me and hide if someone comes. Okay?" He squeezed my hand. For a moment, I wished that I could love Seb, that I could find a way for my heart to react to him in the same way that had reacted to Samson. We could all be happy again. Unfortunately, fate seemed to have other ideas in mind for me.

As I sat on the front porch, I caught sight of my appearance in the window. I looked a mess. My eyeliner was smudged making me look more like a giant panda than anything else. My hair was all over the place and my eyes were so wide that it looked like I had been taking drugs. No wonder nobody wanted.

I stiffened as I heard the sound of footsteps walking quickly around the side of the house. Shit. I needed somewhere to hide. Quickly.

"You can't just walk out on your own party. Emily will murder you."

"I don't care."

"You should. Sarah will be mad as well, you should go back."

"I'd much rather be with you."

I stopped dead in my tracks, not even bothering to hide, as Samson and Silver rounded the corner. Immediately, my eyes locked on their interlocked hands. I remembered the times when he had gripped my hand in his to jump off the cliff, or held my hand when I was crying. I tried to remember the last time he had even spoken to me, and drew a blank. He was too caught up in his Silver orientated world. It was like I didn't even exist to him.

"Madison?"

Silver immediately disentangled her hand from Samson's as she stopped in front of me. I noted the red puffiness around her eyes and the unusual pale look to her face. She was upset, I hated that I cared.

"Leaving so soon?" I hissed. I would not show any weakness in front of them.

"We're just-" Samson trailed off as a gust of wind blew my hair all over the place. Silver looked momentarily confused before her eyes began to widen in realisation. I watched as Samson grabbed hold of Silver's hand again. It was then that I realised they could smell Seb on me. They knew.

"Maddy?" Silver sounded so broken, "What did you do? You didn't? Did you?" She couldn't even say the deed out loud.

"Just had a little fun," I winked, trying to push away any pity I felt for Silver, she didn't deserve it, "I'll tell you all about it if you like. It was hot and sweaty and-"

Samson growled lowly. I had never wanted to smack his handsome face so much.

"Madison?" I stiffened as I heard Seb's voice from behind me. Silver was getting paler by the second. She seemed to almost be in a daze.

"I-I have to go," she mumbled.

Nothing was ever going to be the same again.

"What the hell did you do?" Seb whispered in my ear. Samson looked like he wanted to murder us both, slowly.

_Thoughts? _


	20. Breaking you

_Hey y'all, here's my latest update. _

_Quick reminder: Silver is Ava's daughter. Madison is Kim and Jared's daughter. Sarah, Samson and Seb are Emily and Sam's children. Enjoy.._

**Sarah's POV**

I should have known that the calm was too good to be true. Nothing was ever calm in the Uley household. Ever.

"Tonight was a great idea." I was nestled into Seth's side in an attempt to steal some of his warmth as he spoke. Everything felt so natural with Seth by my side, so right. His left arm was slung casually over my shoulder and I lifted my legs so that they were lying on his lap. Sometimes, I wished we could just stay in our own little world, just the two of us. The bonfire danced in front of me and I bit back a smile as Seth tightened his grip on me. Without looking up, I could feel my Mum's approving gaze on us from across the fire.

I knew she was waiting for Seth and I to take the next step, everyone was. But the thought terrified me. He was my Seth, my best friend. I knew how to act around him and never felt self-conscious; even when I snorted milk through my nose or he caught me singing in my bedroom. With all the drama going on, he was the one constant in my life, the one person in my life that I could count on not to let me down.

Emotions complicated things. I loved him so, so much. I truly did. There were times when I ached to stand up and press my lips to his, but I pushed them away. We were so uncomplicated just the way we were. I adored the way his eyes lit up when he grinned at me and the sound of his laughter when I said something funny. We were the best of friends.

I had grown up with Seth by my side; I couldn't remember a day when we hadn't seen each other. He was always the first to comfort me when I got upset, and the first to growl if someone so much as thought about hurting me. If we became more than friends, expectations would arise. I didn't deal well with expectations, never had. I was the girl who sat alone at the back of the classroom reading a novel. I wasn't outgoing like Madison or quirky like Silver. I was just me, and I was scared that Seth might be disappointed when he realised that I was never going to change. I liked being me, however insignificant that might be in the face of everyone else. I just hoped that Seth would continue to like me too, no matter how quiet I may be.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing, I just…" I could feel my cheeks flushing a deep red under his gaze as I scrambled for something to say, "Just, thank you for dancing with me earlier. You know how clumsy I am." I really was. At times, I would trip over a flat surface.

Seth just rolled his eyes at me, while my Mum and Dad shared a significant look.

"Always." I felt his lips press against the top of my head. Sometimes, I wondered how he put up with me.

Gazing around, my eyes landed on Claire who was laughing at something Quil was saying. Paul and Jared were arguing over the last hot dog while Kim just rolled her eyes. My mum looked the most relaxed she had for a while as my Dad placed a soft kiss on her cheek; they truly were the best parents in the world, however much I argued with them at times. I loved my pack family.

"Are you cold?" Night had descended almost suddenly. I didn't want to go back inside the house, I wanted to stay in the shadow of the fire forever with Seth by my side.

"Seth, you're like a radiator, of course I'm not-"

"What the fuck did you do?" I stopped mid-sentence as all the wolves seemed to jump to attention. That had been Samson's voice . I sighed. So much for a peaceful birthday party.

"Me? You're the one who went and imprinted on Silver!" That was really getting old.

"So you go and sleep with her best friend?" Even from the back garden I could hear the growl in Samson's voice. My whole body seemed to sag in defeat as Seth unwound his arm from around me. He hadn't, had he? I felt physically sick. Seb would not betray Silver like that, or hurt Madison. He just wouldn't.

"Wait here."

I watched in a daze as Seth followed all the other wolves around the front of the house with a sigh. Jared was shaking so much I was sure that he was going to phase. Kim was pale as she collapsed down onto the log beside my Mum - My Mum who was falling apart in front of my eyes; she held her knees up to her chest as a single tear fell from her eyes, which she hastily wiped away.

Desperately, I wished I had brought my book down with me. I needed to escape, to pretend I was somewhere else, just for a second. The voices out front seemed to echo in my head, the hatred I could hear seemed to seep into my skin. Nothing was ever going to be the same ever again; I couldn't believe that I had been stupid enough to suggest a party in the first place. Our family was broken.

"You're so selfish. Everything always has to be about you."

"Me? You're the one who gets _everything_. The best grades, the girls, Dad's favourite. The only thing I had was Silver, and you took that too."

"Oh, stop with the pathetic whiny act," I could hardly differentiate between the growls and the words any longer, "Silver is not a possession. But if she was, she'd be mine. She's going to choose me, especially after the act you've just pulled. You're disgusting."

"Shut the fuck up you-"

"Seb. I swear to god, if you have so much as touched my daughter, I will rip you to pieces."

Across the fire, Kim winced as Jared got involved in the fighting.

"Stop. J-Just please stop."

I stood up suddenly. Madison's voice sounded so scared, so unlike her that something seemed to stir within me. The fighting had to stop. I couldn't keep living in a house terrified to say the wrong thing in case it upset someone. I couldn't keep Madison and Silver apart any longer. And I definitely could not watch as my brother's relationship withered away to nothing. We were the Uley's. We were supposed to be the family that people looked up to, not the family they pitied. I was tired of it.

"Sarah. What are you doing?"

I hardly heard my Mum as I brushed the grass off of my legs before walking cautiously around to the front of the house. It was times like this I understood why my Dad had wanted to live so far away from the rest of the La Push community. If a human was to walk up the hill and witness the scene in front of me, they would have had a heart attack.

Seb and Seth were standing chest to chest, their eyes almost black with fury. I could see the wolf inside of them fighting to take control. It was going to get very messy. Rain started to fall around us.

Jared was trying to attack Seb from behind but my Dad and Seth were attempting to hold him back while Madison sat on the grass sobbing. I had never seen her look so weak. My heart felt heavy in my chest. Uncharacteristically I felt fury build up inside of me. My brothers were hurting everyone who cared about them, and they didn't even seem to care.

"I am going to kill you," Seb growled as he lunged towards Samson. I winced.

"Not if I kill you first."

"Stop." Seth's eyes shot instantly to me as I screamed, while everyone else continued to growl at each other, "Stop it please. Just stop fighting."

They didn't even glance at me. I was invisible, as always.

I saw red. My fury was reaching boiling point. I deserved to have a voice too.

My feet seemed to move all on their own. I was tired of waiting for other people to fight my battles for me. I was strong despite what everyone else believed. I would put an end to the fighting, I had to. I wanted my family back.

"Sarah!" Seth's voice was wild. I didn't even get a chance to look in his direction before I realised what was happening. I heard my Mum's yell from behind me but I didn't turn.

The only thing my eyes could focus on was the black of Seb's eyes and the way his body was jerking in pain. I was too close; I had walked directly between Samson and Seb without even noticing. I was directly in his line of attack. I had just cornered a shifting wolf.

I didn't scream, I didn't even move. Seth's screams joined my Mum's. Everyone seemed to blur around me, and then there was pain; a blindingly fiery pain that seemed crawl up my arm and then encase my heart.

Seb had attacked me.

That was my last thought before everything went black.

_Thoughts? _


End file.
